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, I'll be up at seven-thirty to kill this cunt," a voice intoned over the radio. I looked around, not sure where I was going with this. "Look yer nans ass, look yer face, come on in," I said to my mat

ron. "Yer cunt's so hard I'm gonna give yer pooch a hand, yer fookin' ass is gonna turn a hundred." A few minutes later, I arrived at my favourite pub, The Shag. It was in the old shag street in Ballymun, a place that was well known for its fish and chips and its mums. I had been to Ballymun a few times, for a couple of nights before, when I used to see my friend and I were at the Shag on a Thursday night, drinking and having a laugh at our expense. But this week, I had no intention of going back, because the place was empty and I had heard about the bloody cunt who had been at it the other night. He was at the front of the pub, looking over his shoulder, when a mumbly-voiced, low-pitched voice suddenly bellowed through the speakers. "Yer cunt is fucking on me, you bitch, I'll make yer cunt cum, you cunt is about to cum, now, let me give ya cunt a hand." I looked at him incredulously, wondering what the fuck was he talking about. He opened the door, walked in, and opened the door again. "You're in for a bloody treat," he said. "My cunt is going to come, yer cunt is going to come, I'll give yer cunt a hand." I looked at him, I could tell he was not joking. "I'll show ya, I'll give yer cunt a hand, let

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