Lunch Room Discussion

I'll take things that never happened for $500, Alex.

(still kinda funny)

nothing ever happens
- Rule 29/30 - There are no women on the Internet
  Rule 32 - If there's no proof with a timestamp, it didn't happen
Than he threw a punch at me and I expertly dodged it. As he fell on the ground I said "you even fall like a snowflake"
I would have kept it going if our manager didn't interject and tell him he was fired! Than the manager gave me a high-five and a raise on the spot.
- Then the whole office clapped.
- The manager's name? Albert Einstein
I don't care if it didn't happen, it needs to

Grew up in a Football (Soccer) town. The local team was a fairly big deal and it was pretty much mandatory to be a fan if you lived there.

I was never into sports and started referring to Football as "that game where a bunch of very fit men in shorts and knee-socks, frolic in a grass-field".

It was not appreciated.

"Why would I want to watch 22 men running around in circles chasing a ball for 90+ minutes? Can't you just give them 22 balls and every one of them will be happy!?"
Also not an appreciated response, LOL
- Whoever has the ball is it and all the other men have to chase after him, teehee.
- My personal variation of that was "20 men running after a ball so they can put it deep inside the other team's goal hole"
As an outside observer American football really seems keen about making guys wear really tight white pants. And every play begins with the quarterback miming wanting to reach inside some guy's butt ffs
- Every team sport is really an excuse for men to touch each other.
  I was never into any team sports. At first I thought it was just boring. Now I wonder if it's because I'm just not attracted to other men at all.
Man that's similar to my take on baseball.
Tall, super-model-fit men swing wood at balls pitched by other men.
- Straight guy who enjoys baseball here -- youre not wrong!
  At least baseball doesn't need to have a squad of attractive women bouncing around in skirts on the sidelines to affirm the viewers' sexuality.
Lol this is me basically. I find sports especially areas with heavily sport focused culture off putting and honestly revolting

I feel like that scene with the Joker explaining how people react to others getting shot. There were two school shootings that day and the children getting shot got basically no attention because it's just part of the plan. Now I have people who complained endlessly about political correctness telling me I have to be politically correct.

For some people, it's not about what they believe or what's right. It's about avoiding accountability and winning, no matter what they said before or the cost.

And then everyone clapped

Leftists Marine Todd is a good bit.
You might not believe in him, but he believes in you.

Ah yes, Ohio State University, the only university where the students need help to spell a four letter word

O-H!

I moved to Columbus years ago and never heard this one, that's fucking hilarious
- Welcome to the Church of the Shoe. You're either with us, or Michigan
I am sorry but can you please explain the joke
- At OSU games (and in the area generally) there's a call and answer chant where one person or group will shout "O-H!" and the remaining people will shout a reply of "I-O!"
  I hate it here sometimes
  Blue Jacket games are fun tho
Hey! I'm from Ohio and as soon as I learn to spell ill tell you how upset I am at this slander!

The blood pressure spike this would create in some people might be enough to kill, be careful with things like that. remember: Sticks and stones can break bones, but words can burst a blood vessel.

If I could communicate verbally well id totally use this lol

This is the way. Facts are for suckers, roasting is the new dialectic.

For those like me who have never seen this creature