I want to know what your gender means to you, how you define it, what it means for you to "be" that gender and how you define it. Don't fuss about 'correct definitions' or anything, this is about your experience, I want to know what it means to you. How you relate to that gender, perceive it.
Genders have a social construction aspect and is very subjective, so I think people's subjective, personal views of their own are both important and interesting. Inquiring mind wants to know!
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I don't know if this is uncommon among nonbinary people or not (certainly seems to be in this thread at least), but I have a gender. I actually have a very strong experience of my personal gender. But my gender is just an extremely subjective personal lens through which I experience the world. Idk if I can encompass all of it in a verbal description, but I will try my best.
That's based, nice =)
Np, I had a lot of fun :)
I try my best to delineate that I am not transfem and cannot speak to that experience, while also not incorrectly gendering myself as transmasc. (I hope Iβm doing an okay job of that? Sometimes I wonder if Iβm doing that poorly.)
I don't think I noticed you avoid using "transmasc" label. I sorta assumed you were, but I think I treat the label as basically a shorter version of "CAFAB trans person" (and "transfem" as a shorter version of "CAMAB trans person")
Honestly I really don't mind if I get viewed as transmasc, I think my not using it is mostly an internal thing. If someone else were to describe me as transmasc I would be fine with it, and like you I sometimes use it as shorthand to describe my being a CAFAB trans person when I'm pressed for time and don't want to get into all the ins and outs of my gender experience (like, when I don't want to write a whole essay like I did here.) "Trans man" does feel very wrong though, that feels like misgendering while "transmasc" does not.
Usually if asked I will just say I'm "trans", I like that label on its own, short and sweet. I also fuck with "trans guy", wherein guy represents some nebulous masc-ish neutral-ish weird thing (an extremely subjective personal experience with the word which I do not expect other people to share). Other labels I will use are "genderqueer" and "nonbinary". I don't usually say I'm transmasc, but as I said I don't mind if other people describe me with the label. Idk if that's weird? Labels are very strange creatures to me, I do not pretend to understand them. I also feel like it's very possible that I may start using the transmasc label more in the future; it's honestly something that I waffle on a lot.
Idk if thatβs weird?
Doesn't seem weird to me. I use to be in the same boat. Trans, NB, agender, genderqueer were all good, transfem was a label I thought technically correct but not a fan of using it for myself, and trans woman was a no. Transfem has since grown on me, if for no other reason than no longer feeling like I need to explain my complicated relationship with the label and to avoid calling myself "AMAB" all the time to avoid using that label.
I have the same feelings with identifying as transfeminine vs trans woman. Transfeminine feels inclusive and closer to right and trans woman mostly feels alienating, and with expectations of cis womanhood that I do not particularly align with. down with cis