If you want a witchy girlfriend, this is step one.

I haven't found Mimir's Fountain yet, so I still have both eyes...

Oh and also, my beard is not white (yet).

I haven't hung myself from Yggdrasil to gain the knowledge of the runes yet

Any witches willing to accept two eyes and a Labrador lmk

My name isn't Mr. Wednesday

Genetics :( been growing it out for 4 months and my facial hair isn't even an inch long :( I'm 33, dammit

Getting stopped randomly in the street by people trying to find weed or the Greek Orthodox temple, that's what.

My beards getting there but my taxidermy skills aren't quite as on par

Step 1: Befriend two crows.

Step 2: Name them Hugin and Munin.

Step 3: ...

Step 4: RAGNAROK!!!

Huginn is fine but Muninn keeps trying to peck my good eye out.

Growing a beard

I'm getting there. Been feeding the neighborhood crows and they start going crazy happy when they see me now

Step 1: Be Odin.

Hail Allfather!

Can't grow a beak nor feathers

Jackdaws don't like me. My shinies aren't good enough, I guess?

Only time, my friend.

This is the mid 21st century ma'am. Even the upper class crazy eccentric types with taxidermy black bird goth thrones are enjoying the freedom of sweatpants and t-shirts along side mainainable haircuts in public.

People not feeling the need to wear goofy social posturing clothing like corsets and three piece suits or go through rivers of hair oil is truly a sign of progression. Now we all get to feel half assed at dressing up compared to our great grandparents.

When were done with lazy casual I predict a move to get onto the cyberpunk techno phase. You know, really match our clothing with the mid grade dystopia vibes of our current global situation. Maybe conpare social status with cybernetic augmentations and hack job body mods.

I bet replacing your legs with turbo tank treads then getting them serviced yearly will be the new Iphone. Cybernetic lungs that filter pollutants better than normal ones while extracting more oxygen will be the new Rolex. And of course have a yearly quarterly subscription fee.

Then when we get bored of that the victorian dressup might come back after. But not before.

That's definitely not Anthony Hopkins.

Ravens dont trust my since the bb gun incident

My feathers do attract the witchy ladies.

Trichotillomania

Otherwise it would be fucking easy

I don't have any friends

"Quoth the raven, nevermore"

I don't have any ravens and I like to keep both eyes. Other than that and a few pounds too much I am well on my way to look like this

I can't grow a beard, man.

You know how hard it is to train crows

My ravens won't sit still. Also my eye patch itches like crazy!

Gladden his ravens

Mostly having both my eyes and modern hygiene.

Misplaced my gungnir. When I find it, though...

Why I would need your acceptance?

Every comment on this post is gold. I love Lemmy. It’s like back when Reddit was good.

Still working on the crows, but would narly roosters work as a substitute?