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Why does it seem like Americans have become so hateful and destructive in the past years?

So I'm European and am aware that American culture is very different in many ways. Idk if this is just some type of thing about American culture and mentality in general that has always been there or if it is a trend that started recently in the past few years.

I don't wanna generalize any country and know that not everyone is like this but I definitely noticed this type of pattern.

I increasingly noticed in the past years that many Americans are very hateful/cruel, are lacking empathy, become more and more aggressive and it seems like it’s becoming worse.

I'm not sure if this is maybe related to Americans needing to be "though" or something because I always hear about that the American mentality is pretty competitive and individualistic and instead of saying "we will go through this this together" they often have this mentality "it's either me or you but it can't be both who will win". I mean I'm pretty sure that all these things like this biking culture, driving big "manly" pick up trucks, wrestling, football etc. are pretty prevalent in America compared to other countries and American culture generally seems very loud and direct. I think here in Europe people are way more reserved and I guess the strongest opposite to Americans are probably Japanese people. Maybe American culture is generally more "rough" where they aren't super sensitive and don't really care how their words come over and just speak their mind (maybe cause they value free speech so much).

But to me this seems to go to the point where many Americans seem to have this attitude and are very ignorant and arrogant and basically think they're better than anyone else and they only care for themselves.

And it feels like it's so extreme to the point where everyone is hating, attacking and bashing on everyone and instead of being stronger united they're just fighting against themselves and putting each other down and they always focus on the negative.

Especially online it seems like that no matter what the topic is and independent from whether they are Democrat or Republican they're constantly bashing on someone and baselessly calling them "weak" even though in reality they're probably the ones who are weak and trample onto people cause they're obviously dissatisfied with themselves and aren't able to man-up to face the real issues. You just can't blame everything on others and have to take responsibility for yourself!

Some stuff that I've seen on American news like "Fox News" just seemed crazy where the reporters personally attack and bash on people which is something that would be unthinkable in Europe.

Even though many people were saying that Americans have this "fake friendliness" I'm thinking that even that disappeared in the last few years and they're becoming more open to show what they really think which seems to be that they "don't give a f* about you".

Many Americans that I encountered seem so aggressive like they always need to bash onto something in this toxic way even though they're actually in a very good position and have a lot to be grateful for. Like in other poor countries people have real problems and are literally starving because they have no food or they have war in their country.

I'm always thinking "dude, you need to chill" cause literally no one is attacking them and they're fully secure. But it seems like they're always searching for a fight or something.

It seems like many of these people are so disconnected from nature and become less human and I wonder why they can't just spend meaningful time with other people being positive and not constantly waste their time with hating or complaining about something. Because this just doesn't work and in a society with multiple people especially in a world where everything is more connected than ever we need to hold together and have empathy for one and another. That is one of the core morals that a human needs!

It seems like many Americans generally have this "cruelness" about them cause I also heard things that many Americans are physically beating their children and even the fact that guns are popular and legal in America to the point where you can't even safely walk alone in public during the night or safely send your kid to school and also this general mindset of America is doing everything the best and "America first". I really don't wanna bash on Americans at all and only want to share my experience because I just haven't experienced this type of hate here in Europe in that extreme way and it just makes me very uncomfortable because I feel like this mood is affecting the whole world since American media and influence is prevalent everywhere.

To me it feels like this won't end well and it feels like it's just a matter of time until something very bad happens like the second civil war or so and the storm on the capitol might be nothing compared to that. But maybe that's the only way they will finally learn if they're lacking these core morals and integrity and they don't get educated about that in school.

It also seems like they can't handle critique and can't admit it/stand to those things. When I once asked a similar question on Reddit the only thing I got back was bashing and personal attacks and I hope it's not the same here, cause that is literally just proving my point. There needs to be constructive discussions.

106 comments
  • Don't believe everything you read or hear is what it amounts to. You're getting highly selective, heavily filtered news, not the lives of actual people.

    • i only believe even numbered things i hear; so a full half of things I hear I don't believe.

      • That's odd

      • Thing 73012: Baby gorilla rescued from hold of Turkish Airlines plane ✅

        Thing 73013: The deadliest beings on the planet: can the bacteriophage help in our fight against superbugs? ❌

        Thing 73014: Taliban 'do not see women as human', says Malala in Pakistan ✅

        Thing 73015: Zelenskyy offers Ukraine’s help to fight California wildfires after Trump Jr post ❌

        Yeah, that was simple and fun.

  • American here.

    First, you're right. About basically all of what you said above.

    I think you particularly hit the nail on the head with this:

    I’m always thinking “dude, you need to chill” cause literally no one is attacking them and they’re fully secure. But it seems like they’re always searching for a fight or something.

    The media here, funded by the big corporations, manufacture tons of FUD ("fear, uncertainty, and doubt.") Things to be scared of. "They're putting chemicals in the water that's turning the frogs" (and by extension, your kids) "gay." "The 'woke mafia' is trying to convert your kids to atheism." "The Democrats are going to take your guns so they can install a totalitarian one world government without any resistance." Most of it's not true at all. Some has a nugget of truth but it's not actually any threat.

    I will say the Republicans are worse about this than the Democrats (the Democrats' concerns are more legitimate than the Republicans'), but the Democrats are far from immune. Both are living in fantasy worlds.

    ...until something very bad happens like the second civil war...

    Indeed there's plenty of rhetoric out there pushing the idea that the U.S. is in a civil war. Between the woke antifa (short for "antifascist") and the fascist conspiracy theorists.

  • There's war in Europe. Climate change is fucking up the world faster than we can respond, and America is burning to the ground physically and metaphorically as we speak.

    Tensions are a bit high.

  • Every part of our society is dysfunctional and declining, and that's self-perpetuating. If you throw a rock, you'll hit a reason why the US is like this. We are pretty FUBAR.

    It's pretty much always been this way, like if you look at opinions and rhetoric post-9/11, the overwhelming majority of people supported Bush and it was common to talk about nuking random countries in the Middle East. Back then we were a bit less mask off in that Bush wasn't as blunt and explicit about things as Trump is, but the bodies were just as dead. Trump realized that the facade of politeness had become vestigal and didn't actually matter. As for American liberals, the thing to understand is that they only compare themselves to Republicans and so as long as they are 5% more proper and 5% kinder, 5% more intellectual, etc, they see themselves as having all of those qualities, but from the outside, to someone who has reference points outside of American politics, the differences often seem pretty marginal. So for example, "I can excuse indefinite detention without trial at Guantanamo Bay, but I draw the line at torture" and within the context of American politics that's reasonable and even left-leaning but in a broader context, it's like, "You can excuse what?"

  • When I visited Europe, I had a great time talking with strangers there. One in particular said something similar, in that he thought Americans were just inherently more violent.

    Listen, the reality of the situation is that we're just as friendly and kind as we ever were. Americans are literally the most charitable population. But we're also living in times of great wealth inequality, while our health insurance is still tied to employment. Something like half a million of us go bankrupt every year from medical debt. We are also all uniquely aware that some people will randomly get lucky, and get a massive windfall of money. Money here doesn't just mean comfort, it means security, because if ever our luck runs out, there is no social safety net waiting to catch us. People can and often do go from the highest echelons of the social ladder, to living under a bridge, dying of some easily cured disease.

    In America, it's dog eat dog. It's a zero-sum game. Whatever money you make, is money that I won't. And when money = security, it means that however secure you are, is how less secure I am. 300 million of us all playing the prisoners dilemma. If we work together we could all have a good outcome, but there are so many of us that have fully bought into the me vs. everyone mentality, that it's a near impossibility of getting all us prisoners to work together.

    But a big mistake, is looking at boomer news (fox news, newsmax, oann) and thinking it reflects reality. It doesn't. That is 100% hateful news for hateful people. If you like getting a dopamine rush from looking down on others, or doomscrolling, or in being afraid, then faux news is what you watch. Don't mistake it with America, because it isn't. It is actively poisoning Americans, but if ever you were to get an active faux news watcher to turn it off, sit down, and have a chat, you'd be surprised at how friendly they were. They are people who bought into the zero sum game, but even they know how/when to be charitable.

  • why are European Nazis so hateful and destructive in 2025 (Germany, Italy, Sweden, Hungary, etc)?

    What you see on TV is for-profit corporate media that is showing what their advertisers approve. Its not an accurate reflection of the society as a whole.

    Roughly 30% of the US population are supporters of fascism. Largely this is due to poor education.

  • I gotta say, living in a red state, it definitely feels.like most have gone hollow. I can see the madness in their eyes at work. Its generations of capitalistic abuse, sacrificing ourselves for the profit of the few. I think we have irreparable damage done to our culture's zeitgeist.

  • There are obviously multiple factors that go into this, but I think the big ones are the systematic destruction of the US educational system and the wealth inequality caused by late-stage capitalism. Fixing the education problem will take decades. Fixing the wealth inequality could be done quickly, but things will have to get worse before people begin to agree that it needs to happen. I'm confident that things will eventually get better. I am no longer confident that it will happen soon or without violence.

    Similar things are happening in Europe, with the rise of the extreme right, but the situation there is not as far along as it is in the US. I think Europe still has a reasonable chance of avoiding the worst of this.

    • fixing the wealth inequality can happen quickly

      no it can't sadly, stuff like that takes time to process into law, and to obtain information on. The best way of doing that would likely be a wealth tax, but the second any actual traction hits (which is already a major barrier due to how lobby heavy everything in the states is torwards that stuff) any company that's residing in the US is going to ding dong ditch to another country or migrate that wealth offshore to avoid the tax.

      I think the best route would be either a significantly higher tax on money transfer over X amount yearly between the borders, but that would force company is just to go into how they used to do it before a digital was a thing where they just transport Cold Hard Cash or other physical entities over the borders and then we convert it back over once they're domestic again.

      or alternatively a higher business tax for companies overall, and said taxes are increased even further for a companies who are headquartering outside of the country, but this isn't going to fix the wealth inequality, it's just going to lessen the rate the wealthy gain their wealth.

      The issue with all of these options though, is they all have the same fatal flaw, there's no controls in place that would prevent the company from just offsetting the new taxes into their existing Goods pricing, we're experiencing the same issue with the renters field. Price controls are inefficient and where applied don't generally impact big buisness and instead tend to force the little guys out of the market as they lack the incentive and funding to keep in the market.

      There's the argument that well if they increase the price too far people will just stop buying it in favor of cheaper competitors, but that's not the case for anything that's deemed essential good, which would be most of the grocery sector, the housing sector and the utility sector.

      Sure smaller competitors may eventually pop up, but that's not something that will happen just at the snap of your finger that's going to take years to do

      The US got themselves into a super sticky situation by having years of lack of taxes and controls. They have created a problem that has no real good solution, and it will take some time to fix and it will likely hurt the consumer fixing it, but regardless something needs to be done.

      As for the education sector, that's a whole other issue on its own, while I think that is repairable it like you said is going to take years to accomplish, and the entire time that happens it's going to be fighting an uphill battle because it's hard to argue against if we cut the spending on the sector you save money, because many people can't see past the short-term effects of a decision, making them blind to the overall longterm effects that gutting a public education system has.

      This effect is exasperated by the fact that one of the two major parties heavily pushes the ideology that less knowledge is good, because statistically speaking the further educated you are, the more apt you are to lean torwards the other way, which is something that the party wouldn't want.

      I have to agree with you, it's a roaring dumpster fire and without some pretty disruptive changes nothing is going to be done anytime soon. I'm not advocating violance but the people who say that it's an easy fix, or can be flipped just by someone else taking command are sorely mistaken, this is a problem that is going to be existing for at /least/ the next 3 or 4 presidential terms at best, and that's if it's attacked head on now, which it won't be as it isn't the majorities concern at the moment, for some reason.

      • I don't actually disagree with you. My point was that there is nothing that could be done to fix education quickly while it would be possible to fix wealth inequality overnight. That doesn't mean I think there's a chance of it happening any time soon.

  • The problem is unfettered capitalism. Our leaders are far more concerned about enriching themselves than acting on behalf of their constituents, so we've got this really jaded electorate.

    And then as a dominant super power in the world, we've been targeted with enormous misinformation campaigns, both from our own "news sources" (Fox News is NOT real news, it's lies and half truths and proliferation of hatred!) and fake internet trolls. All of that on top of decades of political corruption, decades of businesses lobbying in their own best interest and spreading lies to support their position ("tobacco is safe and very cool!" "guns don't kill people", "weed is the root of all evil!", "pEoPlE ARe tERMinatInG 9 mOnTh oLd feTUseS anD bORn bABiEs!").

    Conservatives have always been the temporarily embarrassed millionaires, and once they get theirs, fuck everyone else. Generations bought homes at affordable prices, then pulled the ladder up behind them and fuck all future generations. "Pull yourself up by your boot straps!" is sort of bullshit you get from them, but they didn't do that at all and they've broken the whole system in their favor.

    Now conservatives are trying to break our educational system by banning books, banning subject discussion like evolution or slavery, foregoing sex education in favor of the provably bad "abstinence education". A country founded on "separation of church and state" is pushing harder and harder to make a "Christian nation" that doesn't and shouldn't exist. They want a stupid electorate making tons of babies who also grow up stupid and vote for them. The majority of Americans are liberal and have genuine sympathy and compassion for others, so before they wake up and actually get involved, the conservatives have to breed up a bunch of idiots they can convince real easily to vote their way.

    All that to say... I don't think it's going to get any better anytime soon. Get me the fuck out of this place.

  • Can you give some hard examples of what you mean, and a contrast of what you would expect from a non-american please? I'm reading through this post and I don't know what you're seeing. It's not clear to me given what you wrote so it's hard to pinpoint which behaviors you're referring to.

    A lot of the things you bring up (about guns and walking safety at night and sending kids to school) doesn't jive and sounds quite a bit like media washing the entire country. Like. Yes. Guns are legal and lots of people have them. I don't see guns on a daily basis and even when I lived in a particularly crime prone area for the most part gun violence wasn't my main concern.

    The thing about corporal punishment of children is that what's legal and illegal varies by state but it's not outright outlawed to spank children (and I was absolutely not spanked, but beaten as a kid).

    But there's a reason the public hasn't broken out in violent opposition of the government as a whole (the liberal majority I mean) and it's twofold. Americans don't generally want to have to do violence to force change. If we did there would be a lot more Luigi's, Trump shooters, and BLM founders out there advocating in public for violence against the system and the people who uphold it.

    Additionally, people don't want to get involved with that if it means that it will significantly detrimentally affect their lives (which in a lot of cases is very much true). Living in between the "eat the rich/guillotine" idealism and the realism of making it day to day is hard and it doesn't allow a lot of fertile ground for empathy and perhaps that's what you're seeing.

    People have too much still to lose for a civil war to be particularly viable. They haven't reached a level of desperation that will allow most of them to commit indiscriminate violence against the system. But also, the education system has been decimated and so they don't think they understand the system well enough to effect change and that goes hand in hand with not getting involved in politics, lobbying, or playing the long game to indoctrinate liberals in a similar fashion to the way conservatives have been indoctrinated (but for the opposite view point, meaning incensing them to make change via a more long and arduous process that has lasting effects). We didn't see Roe v Wade get dismantled overnight. That was the result of decades of conservative movement. We haven't been actively and cohesively trying to counter that with our own movements.

    I'd also like to add that the vast majority of people live in cities where nature isn't easily accessible and time isn't given to them to enjoy it. I work something like 60 hours a week. Some people work more than that. The system is directly designed to keep people tired, poor, ignorant, and just desperate enough to continue to participate in the system. So yes, we are disconnected from nature in a lot of ways.

  • I think the combination of access to anonymous social media, or at least access to media without any physical interaction, leads to a lack of empathy and hostile behavior. Then you have the echo chamber effect where any group has its beliefs amplified and the extreme members get the most attention. It is trivial to react hostilely and leave a comment like "Go kill yourself" on someone's post. The other person is just a block of text to you. When I write something I have to reread it a few times to determine "How will someone misinterpret this negatively?" and sometimes I feel like I'm writing for an audience of rabid dogs just itching to bite me. All too often even the most innocuous comment will still get a ridiculously hostile response. I'd say this isn't just an American issue on the internet either. I see it with Europeans and Asians. It is a human issue.

    Sadly now negativity has become a kneejerk response. Every stranger's motivations are a personal attack on you, everything is part of some grand conspiracy aimed at you, etc. America's obsession with individualism vs society as a whole seems to have reduced everyone to a crazed survivalist hiding in their bunker.

    "many Americans are physically beating their children"

    I'd say this is MUCH less now than in the past and is now strictly enforced.

    "you can’t even safely walk alone in public during the night"

    Depends on where you live. There have always been "bad neighborhoods" in cities and this is true around the world. I have never felt in danger walking alone at night around my area. I'm sure there are neighborhoods in, say, Paris or Marseille you wouldn't walk around by yourself at night.

  • Car-centric infrastructure and American individualism have made USAmericans isolated and decimated communities and that has lead to a lot of bad things

    1. We're a lot of different cultures all mixed in over a large swath of land. That melting pot regularly reaches a boiling point.
    2. We pray to Capitalism. It is all important. All else is secondary to the almighty dollar. Many of our politicians are bought out and our legislation is determined by money. Greed guides our decision making processes.
    3. The internet has broken many of our brains, although that's not just an American thing. I've been around long enough to have witnessed our politics go absolutely bonkers and the timeline coincides with everyone starting to carry around devices that give them access to the internet at all times. We simply aren't educated enough as a whole to be immune or resistant to misinformation.

    Personally, I don't see our situation getting any better any time soon. It will probably get quite a bit worse, actually.

  • The Americans I've met in real-life were quite chill, and reasonable. But on the Internet I too have a feeling that they are expressing stressfulness more. It seems to me they can freely talk about the things they hate, and they do it, to the point many things on the Internet about the US are those. And it's hard to touch grasses in Winter.

  • I don't really know why. Since I was a kid it feels like there is so much more hate, so much more Red vs Blue. It feels like everyone assumes if you are republican or democrat that you must be far right or left. Gods forbid there are moderates. Gods forbid you care about your neighbor regardless of political or religious belief or the choices they make.

    It feels like "fuck you I'm taking my share and screwing you over" in order to make it in this capitalist society. It feels like philanthropy is a joke, that rich people don't invest in it unless it's a tax break. It's funny we don't see new buildings built with art or frills outside. It's just cold, monolithic type buildings which are as cold as the assholes running it inside. Very few companies care about their customers or employees. They just want those quick profits for the quarter. Fuck everyone else as long as they get their share. They expect this profits to go on forever but they don't realize that it has to end sometime and I hope every one of those companies collapse because of how hollow they've become. I know these are weird things to focus on but I feel like they are symptoms of bigger problems. It shows what is becoming a primary value in society which is MONEY MONEY MONEY instead things like ethics or looking at the bigger picture.

    And fuck all these politicians who are busy lining their pockets with gold. Gods forbid they act like civil servants or at least vote on what is best for the people. There are industries that will get you fined and imprisoned if you commit fraud or the APPEARANCE THERE OF. Politicians should have similar laws slapped on them. Same goes for the Supreme Court which has become a fucking joke.

    I'm sure there's a lot of little reasons that add up to this shit. I'm sure politicians stomping on education has a lot to do with it. It feels like critical thinking is not a basic skill anymore. Sure we can blame ourselves a little, but is it really all our fault?

    And Jesus christ this brain dead social media crap where people just shit all over the internet and post comments or videos full of lies or contraversial crap just to get clicks because of either bullshit popularity or once again MONEY MONEY MONEY.

    I do what I can to tolerate and not create this division of the country and to do what I can locally in the political landscape but I feel powerless to make any real change. That powerlessness is frustrating and infuriating. So yeah, when I see one asshole Ceo get taken out I feel a little glee and I hope it sends a message. I don't wish ill will upon others, but I'm not going to not say "he had that coming." I don't know if that is what others in my country feel but that's how I feel.

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