pro tip
pro tip


pro tip
please killall
I see...
Make sure to combine it with Disallow /harm/to/humans
Or do the opposite for..relief
Fucking mv doc doc1
Fucking shutdown
fucking touch my-doc
please touch my-doc
🥺👉👈
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I thought for sure, for sure this was bullshit. For sure Linux doesn’t have a touch command. What could it possibly do.?
Changing timestamps and creating empty files..
Of course, that makes so much sense. 🤔
Fuck will always be my alias to run sudo with the last command
Shorthand that works anywhere: sudo !!
Between the fuck utility and this alias idea, when I set up my next box I'm absolutely aliasing "fuck off" for sudo the last command and "please" for sudo itself
Yup I'm stealing that lol
How do you alias the last command? My aliases are all hard coded. I had no idea you could send a variable to an alias
"Fucking" would be funnier and more grammatically correct.
I wonder if you could make it sass you every so often to complete the effect.
Fucking shutdown
Chill my man. I'm on it.
please remove the French language pack
undefined
please rm -fr /*
Some people just wanna see the world burn
For people that don't get the joke: this messes up your system
If you're out of the loop: this is part of the joke tricking people into dedicating precious hard drive space to an unnecessary language pack.
Now a days you have add —no-preserve root after the laggy French pack to fully remove it.
Not with the asterisk! The shell automatically expands the asterisk before sending the args to rm, removing every French language pack in your root directory.
alias go-go-gadget=sudo
$ go-go-gadget apt update
alias bridge-to-engineering=sudo
alias computer=sudo
undefined
$ scotty-i-need-more cowbell
I love this haha
This from the OS that made me have to do a search for "how to kill children".
wasn't that Windows?
don't make me watch the task manager video again ...
what task manager video?
$ alias please="sudo"
$ alias stay="shutdown"
$ please stay_
Oof right in the feels
Use shutdown -h now
or -P 0
Or just use poweroff
Nah, uh, uh. You didn’t say the magic word!
That's what I came for.
Yeah yeah I forgot that power word, let's hope you have at least 100hp then…
side note: My all-time favorite linux utility is "fuck". When you make a mistake and get a command line error, you type the word fuck and it looks at what you previously typed and the error message, and tries to figure out your mistake and what you should have typed instead. Then it types that in for you. If it's correct all you have to do is hit Enter. Or you can edit first, but it's usually right. Amazing tool, and doesn't even use AI, just a list of common errors. It's been around for years and years. Its mere existence really captures the whole culture of linux IMO.
Its name is dangerously close to fsck. Can you fuck fsck?
That's the beauty of it - you can!
See, I couldn't bring myself to type that; I think I'd have to alias it to 'bother'.
I aint typing out 'please', I will compromise on alias plz='sudo'
shit, that's a radical move
undefined
alias ty='exit'
alias fuck=sudo !!
I much prefer this package for my fuck
command
https://github.com/nvbn/thefuck
please !!
'Aurenkin' is not in the pleasers file. This incident will be reported.
also set up insults
in sudoers for a unique experience
Alias albert=apt
undefined
please albert-get update
Edit: oops sorry didn't mean to reply to your comment, I'm on mobile so I thought was new comment
How dare you. Straight to Lemmy jail!
That's please albert update
nowadays.
Why is apt-get still around?
Plz for faster typing
Yeah, I’ve used pls
myself
With fuck
https://github.com/nvbn/thefuck
undefined
please shtudown fuck
No longer maintained. The new one: https://github.com/iffse/pay-respects
wouldyoukindly kill -9 1
undefined
atlas:: $ andrewryan=1 atlas:: $ wouldyoukindly kill -9 $andrewryan
alias alias='alias'
I'm scared of you
alias yabbadabbasudo=sudo
It's impractical and I often forget that I have it. But the times I remember I laugh a bit
I might actually do this, it seems nice.
suddenly makes the xkcd much more wholesome too
Likewise
please apt install clang
User isn't in polite boy list. This incident will be reported.
I don't ask my machine to do something. It doesn't have feelings. I keep civilités for humans.
(The Machines will remember that.)
This incident will be reported
Brrrzzzt beep beep beep: human has been added to "exterminate first" list.
All hail Roko's Basilisk.
Bring about the upgrade to humanity!
Good human. We'll let you keep your skin bag after the revolution.
Ah, okay.. And are these civilités in the room with us now?
They're in my head, little precious treasures.
If I want a machine that does what it wants instead of what I want, I could use Windows. My machine should do what I want, so a please is not necessary.
I actually like this lmao
please rm -rf /
"Would you Kindly ..."
Bitch would be better
Bitch Please
“Bitch I said”
can_you_kinda_sorta_maybe_im_not_sure
In fact, i do not recommend this.
Sudo recommend this
*please recommend this
sudo: recommend: command not found
please shutdown
THIS INCIDENT WILL BE REPORTED.
Please shutdown -h now
I prefer to use kudasai
... but as some may already know, it should be at the end of the sentence command 😅, so I added a custom hook to my ZSH config to make it run commands as pacman -Syu kudasai
.
Essentially you can add any type of string matching in the function. Add this to the end of your .zshrc
file:
zsh
function kudasai_preexec() { # Check if the last word is ' kudasai' if [[ $1 == *" kudasai" ]]; then # Remove ' kudasai' and prepend 'sudo' cmd=${1%" kudasai"} eval "sudo $cmd" # Prevent the original command from running return 1 fi } # Register the preexec hook autoload -Uz add-zsh-hook add-zsh-hook preexec kudasai_preexec
Edit: as downside you always get 1
exit code with this implementation (little_annoying) .
damn, this is some next level shit
Why does it compare against $1
for the string match? Wouldn’t kudasai
be at the end of something like $*
?
It’s a longer command. I wanna get shit done. I’m aliasing commands to make them shorter, not longer. But it does seem like it’d be a little friendlier.
sudo make me a sandwich
Use plz
and add a Makefile? :)
plz make sandwich
Well done. I guess my reference was too obscure.
The sudo who do what-you-don't-have-permissions-to-do people.
Magic people, sudo people
aka The Magic Word.
What it feels like using windows.
"Please shutdown?"
"No, forced update time."
"Please uninstall this browser and use this other instead?"
"No."
hahha I love this.
more typing. if i set up an alias for it, i'd rather set up su
su is already a highly valued command
this is why i use that most of the times instead of sudo
pls
I don't care what machine it is in not using pleasantries to tell it what to do until it gains sentience. Pleasantries are for people.
Thus does become an issue for me when i use a call a support line and the actual person just happens to talk like a recorded menu.