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  • I've got really stuck doing this with a friend. She had various MH issues that she didn't try to fix or manage right. Without realising it I was feeding her care seeking which was bad for her... we had a really tiny disagreement and she immediately cut me out of her life. It was awful, and I'm more cautious now.

  • I am a fixer by nature and by trade.

    I'm big for advocating not to fix your partner, because then you aren't partners, but I've spent so much time so deep in the shit that the other day my boyfriend was saying this really sweet, emotional thing about how I "saved" him, and I had to very carefully censor myself because to me, his problems were just... they didn't even register. Among other professionals, I've called it "cute." Like to what I'm used to, his problems were the equivalent of "I can't find the mate to this sock" and I found it in the dryer.

    Of course, his feelings are real and valid and justified, and his worst day is still his worst day, so there's no force on earth that could make me belittle his joy and gratitude but... yeah. Barely even registered that I was "saving" him.

    Which says a lot about him, and a lot about me.

    Fun fact; I think this is my first comment on Lemmy in like 2 weeks. Ya girl busy. Promise I still love ya. Just trying to save the world and doing full time college which was biting way too much off to chew.

    • We've missed you flicker! Sounds like you'd bitten off too much, college and world saving is a lot. Kudos to you for doing it. Have you managed to do what you needed to?

11 comments