When your regime is too dumb to actually foreign policy...

We don't have allies. We have clients, rivals, and victims.

But not right now ... maybe later ... but definitely tariff .... oh, I said it will start now? no, no, no, I meant next month .... definitely tariff

Tarifs for everyone!

Or at least, until Trump chickens out again. Just like every single time before.

Declaring countries will be begging to make deals with us, then delaying dday twice and sending them pwetty pwease letters just for a response.