Don't dump December ended bro... It's time to stop
99Or start, in this case.
28Good point
5
Fiber, lots of.
75As a nurse, I can say this is always the answer, vegetables & fruit. The American diet is horrible for the GI system. When I went vegan some years ago I started having three a day, takes less than a minute apiece
66
The Lemmy cycle:
- bean memes
- shitposts
- beef memes
- memes about never pooping
- back to start
57quick, get this poster some bean memes
13points 2 and 4 are the same.
5I just cleared hard drive of stroganoff memes so that better not come back.
3
You’re two thirds through the Lemmy 3 Days No Poop Challenge.
Hang in there!
44Exactly my thought when i saw this post
6
43Depends, are you trying to poop, or doing the 3 day challenge?
28Not long ago on Lemmy this was a goal, not a problem.
1
Probably more effective than any of the suggestions so far:
Make sure you are well hydrated and do some exercise or at the very least a long or high-energy walk.
28For the love of God eat fiber and drink water. How hard is this?
20Some people have slower digestive systems than others
It's not uncommon for me to go several days without a BM, no matter how healthily or unhealthily I've been eating
6#🥵
1
Well, I haven't pooped since last year, I bet that stuff is pretty damn hard by now if you really must know. 😅
6Coprolite Diamonds?
2That's what killed Elvis fyi
1
I do drink a lot water and eat a lot of nuts and bananas, and apples and eggplants...
4Drink some coffee
6
You can hold it in for up to 2 weeks, speaking from experience here.
You'll be fine
18But oh, god, the pain. What a way to escapeTheStall.com !
I had to turn my prescription and left-overs back into the pharmacy after day 4 because the smallest opiate scripp left me in more pain than the original complaint and I had that gait that only really pregnant women or really old men have.
1
I recommend pooping asap.
17Why are you still holding on to last year's shit?
15Fiber and water. Find yourself a nice, vegetable soup recipe.
13This might only be me, but when I'm constipated, my go to is hydration and lettuce.
I'll get myself a nice big salad, and eat it super fast. The idea is that if you eat it fast, you won't chew as much. The partially unchewed lettuce can help irritate your guts into doing a bit of a clean cycle. (Plus, veggies are already great for constipation.)
Best of luck, and wishing a healthy one for you soon haha.
13That's a good tip. My personal choice is celery. Celery has higher water content, and more insoluble fibre than lettuce. And you can eat it pretty quickly too.
6
You're just charging your ultimate attack.
9Try chewing gum, a few pieces a day.
8BE VERY CAREFUL DOING THIS!!!! you may accidentally chew too much gum, and blow a bubble so big that you float away into the sky.
34You could also swallow it by mistake and it gets stuck for years.
8
What does it do
1
Vege smoothie
7Don't Poop January
7OP this post is a few hours old now if still nothing, you could try a single dose of milk of magnesia to get things going but continue a high fiber diet the next few days to get everything back on track.
6This reminds me. Apparently, in a pinch, you can also dissolve a few teaspoons of epsom salt (magnesium sulfate) in water and drink that. Would have never guessed that stuff is even safe to consume if I hadn't read "saline laxative for relief of occasional constipation" on the front of the bag I just bought.
3
Whatever mizu did, do the opposite.
6Metamucil, salad, veggies. No meat or cheese. You’ll be good by tomorrow.
65 mile run always does it for me.
6Two words: magnesium citrate.
5Two other words: Eat vegetables.
8
The seed shells from Cassia Angustifolia
Make a cup of tea from them, wait 12 to 24 hours.
Enjoy. Just don't drink it everyday for weeks.
You can find it in herbal stores i am sure.
It is prescribed by doctors at least in some European contries
5Push
53 times a day to every 3 days is normal.
When was the last time you pooped?
4i literally yelled "Hey Sharon! You gotta see this" today in the washroom.
4Do as I do and get Legionaire's disease on the 30th of December. Bonus points if that's your birthday like it is mine.
4Happy Birthday
3Thanks 😁
2
Coffee and crunches homie
4Get the flu. It'll clean you right out. The vaccine wasn't very effective this year. Ask me how I know.
4So far so good on vaccines this year for me.
3Sample size of 1 is not very conclusive.
12 parents, 2 kids, one uncle, 4 grandparents all got it. All vaccinated. Not a large sample but larger than 1.
1
Fibers or a french breakfast : coffee + cigarette = poo (or in French CCC: clope, cafee, caca). Or if you realy need to, those gels you can put in your bum if you're into that
41.) Sit on a toilet
2.) Concentrate
3.) Become Forspoken protagonist https://youtu.be/1zo3jPUPbeI?si=xP_ADMTsdJlkt78e
3Second day of the holidays > can't stop pooping
Man this period isn't good for your health...
3The biggest most giant enema you can find
3Bear down!
Also love the username, fellow Role Models fan?
3Yeah: don't spend 18 hours drinking and taking cocaine.
2I'm having the same issue. I thought I had food poisoning because I have chills, stomach cramps, and constipation. But the only culprit would be the three cups of raw broccoli I had on NYE.
2That soccer team that crashed in the Andes dug it out with a stick or bone.
2Just do it.
1Also haven't pooped yet, but only because I'm at a relative's beach home and we're out of water, so I'm waiting until I arrive back home today to go.
0I don't really understand how this is supposed to be funny, could anyone explain?
0No shit!
6
