Dude! The gym I used to go to when I was still able to lift was brutal about that shit.
And I don't mean towards the folks coming in to improve themselves. The guy that owned the joint was just a super gentle, kind person. But he was willing to make sure anyone there knew they could use the place free of bullshit.
It was a super friendly place for women and girls for one thing. The membership specified that as one of the things that was grounds for immediate revocation if membership. You didn't harass other members, and it did apply to everyone. You know how some gyms get with women. It's fucking ridiculous sometimes. But at his place, a woman could show up and know that not only would the owner and staff intervene if someone got annoying, that they'd never see the person again. Most of the regulars would step in as well.
He was also hell on wheels about people coming in that were out of shape, be it fat or really skinny. You do not fuck with someone trying to do better. It was printed out over the entrance to the weight area. Gym policy was firm on that, but you'd sometimes get some new meathead that came because it was known for having great support for power lifting that didn't believe it.
And we didn't stand for it either. It was always more of a low key , "not cool man, you can't do that here", and if they stopped, they'd eventually stop being watched like a rabbit in a wolf den. But if they didn't, somebody would go get Paul, or whoever was on office duty, and any other regulars would be taking the beginner to the side and apologizing while someone else explained to the meathead that they just lost their membership and not to cause any shit.
Best fucking gym I ever went to. Everybody was super helpful and chill, but weren't afraid to help hype you up for a big lift. And hype you up after one, as far as that goes.
Hell, when I first had to stop lifting heavy stuff and go for more of an overall workout, it was all support. And when I got hurt at work years later, Paul told me not to worry about membership fees at all. Just wanted me to know I could come in and do whatever my physical therapist wanted me to, no worries.
Loved that fucking place. It closed during COVID, and Paul couldn't afford to open back up
I'm a fat guy currently going to a gym where nearly everyone is fit and built, and everyone has been nothing but kind and supportive. I've even had people come up to me and say they've noticed my progress and congratulated me (I've just hit 10% body weight weightloss if anyone's interested).
Always love hearing people found supportive gyms! Congrats on the progress and keep at it dude, soon enough you'll be on the other side supporting those in your shoes now!
That's precisely why I'm not there. I'm too fat for the gym. There are women and Children present. I'd scar them for life.
ETA:
To clarify: This is not what happens, this is my own self conscious, self loathing behavior giving me excuses for not bettering myself. I am aware of my mental health problems, I'm just not dealing with them.
Literally no one makes fun of overweight people at the gym OP probably never stepped foot in a gym in their life. People are too busy doing their own thing to care. Plus gym goers are supportive people who would respect you for trying to better yourself anyway
Definitely was one of my biggest fears growing up. People absolutely make fun of people at the gym, just not to their face and normally not about their weight. They normally just make fun of your form and stuff like that but only when they’re slackin.
Nah bruh, most gym communities are pretty welcoming places. I love seeing fat folks making an effort - how the hell are you going to give someone a hard time for trying to make themselves better? That's pathetic and I don't think that happens much at all.
I'm on the other end being a wimpy twig, I step on machine that a 50yr old woman just steps off and I cut the weight in half of what she had it on and start grunting. I'd be an easy target I guess if people wanted to be jerks, but I've seen nothing but respect thankfully.
Building muscle is hard for some folks and it takes time. The biggest dudes at most gyms are the nicest folks. The "big guys" that make fun of people... Get eaten for breakfast by the real gym kings. You don't get huge by being full of yourself, you get that way through a ton of hard work and learning to humble yourself.
I knew a dude that was a pro wrestler, huge AF. Had the world's biggest comic collection in his basement, total sweetheart. He played a heel to further add insult to injury lol
OP is lying, probably never seen a gym in person. This literally never happens. Many/most gym goers started overweight or at least nervous, intimidated. Everyone is very sympathetic for this situation and if anything, you will get encouragement and genuine help if you need. But most like, people will just mind their own business, unless you muster up the courage to ask them to show you how that machine works.
No bullshit my homie, a good gym, one that's more focused on strength training in specific, is the best place to start. I can't promise there won't ever be assholes, but even the fairly generic gyms that do more aerobics and cross fit type of stuff are good about it. And the typical weight room, even when it's body builders rather than folks that are strength focused are often going to be more than welcoming.
You have no idea how many really big guys didn't start out that way. A lot of them started lifting because they didn't have a good foundation in physical fitness as a youngster (myself included). So I can promise you that assholes making fun of you are extremely rare.
So, if you ever manage to get past the self consciousness enough to try it, I think it would be the perfect start. Even if all you do at first is go in, do some curls on a machine and walk back out, I promise you that you'll start to see improvement from it in a few weeks at most. And once you see that first little bit of change, it'll help your brain realize that the rest can change too. It's your body, and you can own it the way you want it. It's hard fucking work, every single time, and it never really stops. But it's there when you're ready to do that work.
I can't think of many things that shut up the inner critic more than physical fitness efforts. For me, it was lifting and then marital arts that made things work. Dealing with that kind of self esteem and doubt and fear is a giant barrier for sure (again, I've been there), but if you can get that first step taken, it's worth it.
I've been considering it more and more. There's a gym nearish with a pool, and I'm a very strong swimmer, and it's one of the few exercises that isn't physically painful because of my bad back and feet. But for real, I know no one is actually making fun of me or other heavy people in that environment. It's more my own brain narrating the worst possible opinions and applying them to everyone I meet. Which, funnily enough, is me doing to everyone else what I fear they are doing to me: being unkind.
Aside from the fact that no sane person would mock you for trying to better yourself, you could also start smaller and just, say, go for walks or swimming at a local pool or other not-gym forms of exercise.
I can’t wait until we have good exoskeleton tech. You could reduce a person’s felt weight by 50%. Like those pull-up bar machines with a platform you can stand on. You can develop the muscles even if you’re too weak to do a single rep un-aided.
A great alternative would be an o’neill cylinder or a spaceship under thrust, so you could control the gravity. Like imagine a big o’neill cylinder that was for helping people escape the pit of morbid obesity. People could start out living at 0.1 g, just to sort of remember what it’s like to dance and jump and be nimble. Over the course of a year you could spin that cylinder a little faster and a little faster and the gravity would gradually increase, and people’s bodies adapt to it as it goes.
You could even go beyond 1 g. People could slowly and steadily increase it up to 1.5 or 2 g, and come back to earth strong as fuck.
The simplest way to condition your body is temperature. Just running cold water over your body provides physical benefits, including toward mental health.
Don’t let yourself slide. It only gets darker and darker if you let yourself go downhill.
I’ve never seen even the slightest bit of negativity at the gym. Come to think of it, I’ve seen almost zero negativity between any strangers on the street in like 10 years.
I've had a few "gym-bro" friends and absolutely none of them ever shamed or made negative remarks about a fat person at the gym. Personally I feel a sense of pride when I see someone relatively unhealthy doing any kind of exercise, it takes effort when you're not used to it!
Yeah I never understood people who fat shame people at the gym... It's like making fun of someone for being addicted at a rehab clinic, it's like making fun of someone for not having a job at a job interview... It's lack mocking someone for having a problem in the middle of solving said problem.