8 mo. ago • 99%

You may want to wear sunglasses though

96 comments

Remember six feet for covid, Nine for Nuclear.

135
- Six for Sneeze, Nine for Nuke
  
  56
- Don't forget to stop, drop and roll.
  
  25
  
  I thought it was "duck, and cover"
  
  7
  
  Everything’s getting so complicated these days, they even added a fourth step: Stop, drop, Atoll, Atone.
  
  2
You wouldn't suffer any long term effects from the blast at that distance.

127
- Nuclear brain move
  
  4
You either want to be close enough for instant death or far enough to be mostly unaffected. The middle ground where you die slowly from cancer or get crushed by debris or something would suck

72
- The burns and your body turning into soup from radiation is the real terrible part.
  
  17
  
  slush
  
  6
Well, getting instantly vaporized is safer than getting hit by debris or getting all types of cancer at once.

46
- You and I define "safer" differently.
  
  6
  
  If you're vaporized, bits of you have no chance of hurting anyone else like they could if you were hit by debris and simply exploded into chunks.
  
  6
you have to stay 9 feet away as the shockwave expands. That's the trick

45
- The shockwave will help keep you safe by moving you another 500 away from the epicenter.
  
  8
  
  In many different directions.
  
  4
- Would that actual save you? Because, I thought the radiation also kills peoples far outside of the shockwave range...
  
  5
  
  That’s the thing: people wouldn’t survive that. The only thing that could survive it is some sort of glassified sand immediately beneath the explosion. So sand dgaf, I guess?
  
  4
  
  You can't outrun radiation
  
  2
Google's featured snippet thing is not only a bad feature, it's actively causing harm. It's extremely unreliable, but people who aren't tech literate, which is most people, think "well it's Google, so it must be right." Sometimes it's obviously wrong in a funny way, but more often, it's doing something like parroting dangerous medical misinformation. To make things worse, it's very likely to answer a question, which is the search form preferred by the technologically illiterate, with a yes. I would go so far as to say they should be sued for gross negligence for implementing it. It's killed people, when antivaxxers say they "did their own research", there's a good chance it was a Google featured snippet reinforcing their claim.

41
- Sorry, you're not wrong about the misinformation and how removal from context can change the meaning of the he snippet. This is just my favourite.
  
  25
- It's going to be more and more unreliable as the results it's snipping from are increasingly machine-generated.
  
  9
- This is true.
  
  But this screenshot is old if even real. I googled it and the snippet was much more realistic and detailed.
  
  More to your point::
  
  One snippet I recently saw that was wrong was the result for ‘population of Gaza.’ It showed the population of Gaza city, which is tiny fraction of Gaza.
  
  7
Yes, but what is the distance from the blast to perfectly cook a frozen pizza?

31
- Sometimes you can find instructions for different ways to cook a pizza on the back of the box. For example I checked mine and underneath airfry and oven instructions there was instructions for "nuclear blast"...
  
  Nuclear Blast
  
  Remove pizza from all packaging and shrink wrap. Be sure to remove and discard the cardboard tray.
  
  Place pizza on metal baking tray within a clear path of the blast source. Do not use glass cookware as it might shatter.
  
  About 5 miles out from the blast source. Find a sturdy structure, like a rock deeply embedded into the ground.
  
  Place pizza on the tray and tilt tray to a 45 degree angle on the rock. Angling toward the blast to evenly cook.
  
  Bake for 5secs for 15 kiloton yield atomic bombs or until pizza is golden brown. Grab pizza and run to shelter before the shockwave hits. If the shockwave hits your pizza it will disintegrate.
  
  All atomic bombs cook differently, so be sure to keep an eye on your pizza as it cooks and not the blast. Pizza is done when the cheese is melted and edges are golden brown.
  
  49
  
  Damn, my nuclear bomb is only 8 kiloton and I never know how to convert.
  
  25
  
  Pretty sure this isn't real guys. There's no "Do not thaw pizza" clause.
  
  19
- Tony?
  
  8
  
  Tony Pizza!
  
  9
  
  Frankie Delicissio? I hear he's datin your sister.
  
  4
- This sounds like a question for Randall Munroe.
  
  4
  
  Very much so
  
  3
Is this A"I"?

30
- Artifical Idiot still fits. The question is, why we invent an artifical idiot having too much of the real ones.
  
  29
  
  There is a reason, antennas that are searching for intelligent life are directed away from earth
  
  16
  
  Because this is an idiot you don't have to pay to do his job
  
  9
  
  They were right. They'll always make a better idiot.
  
  9
  
  Feelings of control. "Hey Idiot, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and come in this weekend (and every weekend from now on).
  
  If you could do that, yeah that would be great."
  
  4
oh no, I only have 2 feet

28
- Same, guess we'll die.
  
  8
  
  I'll taking both of your feet tqvm.
  
  4
I was told that when you see a nuclear explosion then you should carefully observe it because you'll never see anything like it again in your life.

25
This must be the "dangerous misinformation" I keep hearing about.

24
Just stay inside a refrigerator and you will be OK 👍

20
- https://youtu.be/jn4Vhkmb4Lw
  
  2
  
  What the fuck? I thought that was some clever photoshop shit until I started reading the comments
  
  3
  
  Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
  
  https://piped.video/jn4Vhkmb4Lw
  
  Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
  
  I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.
  
  2
20
- What is that from?
  
  2
  
  Waterworld, when the Exxon Valdez ignites.
  
  4
  
  Waterworld
  
  3
- https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/4aa6f316-014a-4ad1-9a3d-57301b64d9f3.webm
  
  1
Sarah Connor already told us how to prepare:

"Anybody not wearing two million sunblock is gonna have a real bad day"

17
I mean, maybe if it's a really, really small nuclear explosion

16
- Nah. There are now three sets of imperial units: UK, US, and U235.
  
  11
Well for what it's worth, it didn't specify that it's 9 feet from the blast center. If we define the blast by its radius of safety, then staying that distance plus 9 feet will, in fact, keep you safe

15
Time is relative so this is technically true

11
10
Or hide in a fridge.

9
Thanks ChatGPT

8
Wait, does it have to be exactly 9 feet?

8
- Of course. An inch in either direction would be extremely dangerous.
  
  15
- No. The second option is 9.31 feet.
  
  4
  
  Ok, 9 feet and 3.72 inches.
  
  1
  
  I'm gonna need that in feet and inches my friend. This ain't the metric system, and I don't feel like doing math :/
  
  1
"The ~~goggles~~ sunglasses, they do nothing!"

8
Whose feet, JFC! :O

6
- Jersey Fried Chicken?
  
  7
  
  6
Been eating paint chips all my life for this moment

6
what PF 🧴 should also get?

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- At least 10.
  
  1
  
  gotcha
  
  1
It got confused by all the American measuring units. Probably meant 9 chinchillas.

5
- How many farthings is that?
  
  2
  
  Depends on the colony you're counting them in.
  
  1
  
  9
  
  1

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