for me its when the dom is the oxymoron of sadistic and gentle... like the line is definitely blurred a bit but i think you can definitely have that mommydom vibe but still be into like spanking, bondage, etc.
in terms of shit i'm not into, cucking, or just in general mean-dom.
not sure how big this instance is gonna get, but gonewildaudio is one of my favourite subreddits. I actually have no idea what's going to happen to that subreddit if they decide to not reopen. Because that really was a unique place, most of the rest of the content you can find elsewhere but I genuinely have no idea where to find that kind of stuff if not for reddit.
usually what happens with me and cnc is like fucking love it whilst watching, but then I think of the unfortunate implications afterwards... its why hentai/drawn stuff is nice because at the end of the day you know nobody was coerced/pressured/forced to do it because they have no money otherwise.