I’m not gonna spend 1-2 hours a day lifting weights to get the benefits a single cigarette I smoke in a minute or two would

Supposed benefits of smoking a minute or two aren’t even remotely comparable to the benefits from an hour or two of exercise.

Poison ivy is natural. Disprove that.

Nice anectdote. Decades of medical research must be wrong.

As an aside, the same is true for caffeine. It causes greater alertness but that lasts for only about two weeks of daily use. Beyond that, it's just an addict getting their fix.

He'll quit later, after his girlfriend has left him for a non-smoker who listens to her.

The health benefits you can't find any evidence of? Yeah, those benefits.