and the current “Hide read posts” option is just a bit too overkill

Exactly! I don't want to read everything I hide and I don't want to hide everything I read.

Links for the lazy.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lilli_(comic_strip) 1952-1961
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bild_Lilli_doll 1955-1964

Oh cool! Thank you! Now to begin the arduous process of training a new workflow into muscle memory. :)

Unfortunately it only opens in the background and doesn't open in a new tab and switch to it. I usually use both.