2 mo. ago • 96%

Switchblade-Wielding Subway Rider Locked In Standoff With Penis-Wielding Subway Rider

theonion.com Switchblade-Wielding Subway Rider Locked In Standoff With Penis-Wielding Subway Rider

CHICAGO—Sending commuters into a panic, a switchblade-wielding subway rider was reportedly locked in a tense standoff Thursday with a penis-wielding rider. “As soon as the two of these guys made eye contact, everybody knew there was no way they were getting out of there without a fight,” said witnes...

7 comments

you can't bring a penis to a knife fight, man

15
- A penis can become a ranged weapon.
  
  3
  
  It sure can, with the switchblade's help.
  
  1
- Ultimate intimidation weapon.
  
  3
The penis mightier than the sword

10
- Actually audibly chuckled
  
  3
- But what if Thompson's Penis a Sword?
  
  1

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