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[Satire] Local shoplifter claims he was just trying to balance his trade deficit with Coles

Local man Don has told shopping centre security that he did not attack Coles by stealing an entire shopping cart full of groceries, claiming that he was simply balancing a trade deficit.

The thief announced a sweeping plan to steal 10% of all items from every store, which he claimed will help bring down the heavily inflated prices of groceries.

3 comments
  • You can alternatively put a tariff of 20% on Coles and Woolworths.

    So, every 5th item is free and you don't need to scan that.