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The Onion @midwest.social

restingboredface @sh.itjust.works

9mo ago

Trump: When You're Feeling Low, Just Remember I'll Be Dead In About 15 Or 20 Years

theonion.com When You're Feeling Low, Just Remember I'll Be Dead In About 15 Or 20 Years

My friends, everybody has their down days, and during these long winter months it is especially easy to succumb to the doldrums and find yourself in a bit of a funk. But not to fear! I have a simple tip that’s guaranteed to pick you up and get you back in good spirits in no time, and here it is: Whe...

When You're Feeling Low, Just Remember I'll Be Dead In About 15 Or 20 Years

Thanks, Onion, that does make me feel better.

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34 comments

I'll take action on under 5.
- Honestly, he's going downhill fast. Not that he was ever very uphill. But still, his faculties clearly aren't improving.
- days
  
  I honestly don’t think he makes it to January.
  
  If there's anything worse than the words "President Trump" it's "President Vance"
  
  Would MAGA in the government and MAGA voters solidify around James Bowman*, or would they tear themselves apart trying to be Donald’s successor?
  \
  \
  \
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  \ MAGA don’t allow preferred names, right?
  
  Depends what the AM Radio Crowd tells them to do
  
  Will they all be able to stick to one script?
  
  Given how consolidated the market has become? I doubt Clear Channel has any trouble corralling their horses.
  
  Start spreading conspiracy that couchlover fed poison to orange turd.😶‍🌫️
  
  Inshallah
- 🙏🏻
- What are the odds on 4?

34 comments