We Paid Some Etsy Witches to Curse Charlie Kirk
We Paid Some Etsy Witches to Curse Charlie Kirk
www.jezebel.com
Update to the Jezebel Charlie Kirk Story
38 comments
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I am getting so many uses out of this meme today
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In 2020 there was a worldwide pagan ritual on Halloween (in which I participated) to bind Trump in order to prevent his election. Biden won. In 2024, there was no collective ritual and we know how that turned out. I don't actually believe in magic, but at this point, I'm happy to hedge(witch) my bets.
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Thank you for your service, Etsy Witches.
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So, did my Etsy curses work? Time will tell. The forces move in mysterious ways, and as the Priestess reminded me, “Spellwork is a collaboration between the caster, the client, and the universe itself.” For now, we can only trust in the timing of the great unknown.
The Universe says, "hold my beer."
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By Wednesday, I checked Charlie’s socials to see if he was spouting anything new.
He sure was spouting blood from his neck.
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The great unknown has a sense of humor it seems
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It's particularly fond of irony I find.
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If anyone deserves a tip for exceptional service, it's those Etsy witches.
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For doing fuck-all?
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Let’s raise more money for witches!
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Wow. Curse of hatred on the new moon in August. Dead just after the Full moon of September. I hope the author purchased the protection spell.
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Those witches could make a fortune with a time limited discount for hexes on Trump
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And P eter The il
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Peter think has evil protection magic.
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The curse of McDonald's
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This is how religion starts
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Looks like their caster rolled a nat 20 and scored the crit of a lifetime.
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"Hold my staff, fam"
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You Shall Not Pass!
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"Etsy witches." So that's what hitmen are calling themselves online now?
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I mean, it's manual labor from a distance, what else would you call it?
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Fucking hell this just gets better:
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man i ain't never cast no curse, always felt it was bad juju, but i gotta look into this shit.
new moon near the equinox comin up. hrm...
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How
do Ican my friend contact them?-
do not worry, they are panicked as fuck and busy cleansing their space now that a spell has worked, and busy preparing a Big Spell for the equinox with everyone else
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Well, that's customer satisfaction.
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Wow those witches are just really direct.
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No refund needed.
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man, i bet business is booming for Etsy witches right now
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Who else is in their cursor?
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Five stars, would unholy ritual summon again!
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Kickstart 'Curse Charlie KirK'
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Guy shot, killer not found, perfect. Could they lay out how one would curse someone like this?
Do I have to ask gpt about this for my fictional novel?
38 comments
Wow, that is impeccable timing.