It was a love story after all
It was a love story after all
Just two dudes getting married, nothing gay about that
1
7That guy was a real life doctor at one point.
4Yeah, and yet he's most known for showing his small dick in The Hangover. Hilarious.
2
The elvish council spent centuries debating why Sauron would do this, but the truth was he was interested in the tax deductions and a detailed income splitting scheme that harvested losses from Dwarven commodity futures to offset Mordor’s growing volcano habit.
Smaug was only ever in the Lonely Mountain to fully calculate wealth Sauron had sheltered there.
17Does this mean Smaug was a tax auditor? No wonder nobody liked him.
8Most dragons are misunderstood. Do you know how long it takes to count a mountain of jewels and coins, with at least one jewel worth entire kingdoms hidden in the stack?
You can't estimate the value by weight, it's a heterogenous mixture. It must be meticulously counted in only the way a dragon can.
It's no wonder they attack anyone trying to steal from the horde they're working on.
8
What if we kissed under the Great Eye? 😳 Haha jk jk, unless... 🥺👉👈
11Oops! All Gay
7and in the darkness.... Bind them... to the following terms and conditions regarding... well, you see, we've been trying to reach you regarding your auto coverage...
16I'm sorry Elrond and Lorien, the terms and conditions state you must resolve the war of elves through binding arbitration adjudicated by the Mouth of Sauron.
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Man, deciding where to spend the holidays is going to be a nightmare.
31 to Sauron, 3 to the elves, 7 to dwarves, 9 to humans.
3+7 = 9+1
Sauron shipped a himself and a bunch of humans with elves and dwarves.
10Can't beat that +2AC. Shame about the 7 day limit, though.
8Shipping intensifies
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