11 mo. ago • 72%

As far as we know, there are 0 Taco Bells on Mars.

36 comments

As far as we know, there are only taco bells on the planet earth. As far as we know, taco bell is only a taco chain not a secret society masquerading as fast food taco restaurant. As far as we know, taco bell did not organize the JFK assassination. As far as we know, taco bell was not used to feed POWs during WW2. As far as we know, taco bell is not the public face of the order of the taco, a global shadow government that has ruled the realm of man since the dawn of time, deciding who wins wars, who develops technology, and who wins elections.

30
- But they are the favorite to win the fast food wars
  
  12
  
  Didn’t Pizza Hut win that outside of the US?
  
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- Given the incomprehensible vastness of the universe, it’s the height of arrogance to assume that Taco Bell has not arisen in other star systems. The only thing doubtful is that extraterrestrial Taco Bells have visited Earth.
  
  7
  
  Ah, the Fertaco Paradox!
  
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Also population 100% robots

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- That we know of, at least.
  
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Just tried using Google Earth to check for any Taco Bell locations to confirm this. How convenient that it wouldn't let me look anywhere close to Mars. They're keeping something from us!

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- https://www.google.com/mars/
  
  7
  
  Kinda neat, but pretty janky. Can't get it to open up in street view.
  
  11
What do you think will be the first fast food franchise on Mars?

My guess is Subway. Don't need to cook anything and all of the ingredients already have enough preservatives to make the journey.

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- Subway will also sell franchises to anyone and everyone, regardless of how close another franchise is.
  
  It makes a lot of money for corporate at the expense of fucking over the franchise owners.
  
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  So you're saying Subway will be both the first and second fast food restaurants on Mars?
  
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The Mars franchises are called Bell de la Taco, they have different branding laws on Mars. Lots of red tape.

10
Are you suggesting that Martians hate fake Mexican food???

I think that may be racist, but I'm not sure towards whom...

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Yet.

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There are also no toilets yet on Mars either, so it's probably just as well.

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- It'd be legendary to be the first person to poo Taco Bell in a hole in the ground on Mars though
  
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As far as we know, this is a shit post.

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At some point there will be a race for what fast food chain is the first to go interplanetary

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there are not that much more tacobells outside of US

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Permanently Deleted

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As far as YOU know, mister.

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There's at least 1 Planet Hollywood, though. Arnold set it up while filming Total Recall on location.

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~~As far as we know~~, there are 0 Taco Bells on Mars.

FTFY.

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- I think it’s a reference to Russell’s Teapot
  
  0
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Russell's Taco Bell

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Nooooo

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Fair enough, but Taco Bell will give you squirts that resemble Jupiter.

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- I don't know why people keep saying this lol
  
  Are there people out there who think taco bell has anything spicy on the menu?
  
  4
  
  Probably because the lettuce in the tacos is the only fiber they've had in in a while.
  
  3
  
  Spicy? No, it’s just a bunch of garbage “food”
  
  -1

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