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Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world

too_high_for_this @lemmy.world

1w ago

I just ate a little bag of popcorn without getting any bits stuck in my teeth/throat. ask me anything

63 comments

How? Are you a wizard?
- Yes I am necornmancer
  
  Could have gone with nonomancer
Have you considered joining a traveling circus in order to display your ability?
- No carnies are my number two fear
  
  What's number one?
  
  Small hands, you know. Smell like cabbage
Should I rebuild my base in Factorio to massively boost copper and circuit production or just wait for module production to catch up?
- the factory must in fact grow
What's it like, knowing that you've just peaked?
- I peaked like 10 years ago when I hooked up with a gorgeous redhead friend
  This is a close second though
  
  perks of necromancy
What other lies have you told?
- Now, now, I’m sure there’s a kernel of truth in there!
  
  Damn it. Why do you have to be so corny?
Me too!
I need data. What brand, wattage of microwave if used, length of cook.
- This. People who arent from the corning community might cook until just past the pop-threshold and then test themsleves without a rigorous method... If you cant prove stuff like statistical significance its not chewing technique it could just be chance.
When did you decide to become a liar? 😀
- There's one stowed away, just you wait. We'll all be seeing an update post soon.
if corn is a fruit is popcorn is also fruit?
- Corn is a fruit in the same way that oxygen is a metal
  
  this is a really good answer
  
  nno
Did you forego chewing and eat like a duck?
- Way more suggestive than intended.
  
  I dated her.
Did you forget to microwave it first?
what flavor
- Popcorn flavor
- Pure unadulterated popcorn-infused butter
Which lottery numbers are you picking?
what's the technique?
- Relax the throat and cup the balls
  
  Littering and? Littering and?
  
  If I cup my throat and relax my balls will it have the opposite effect..?
  So many questions !
How does it feel to have offended God?
Does art have a goal?
- Yes, to serve as a medium in which life can be examined and critiqued, as well as a money laundering vessel
How do you sleep at night?
- With my eyes wide open. It creeps people out.
  
  Why? How many people are watching you sleep?
how much throat numbing spray did you use?
Did you pop the corn?
Do you have teeth? How big of a bag and was there more than one in it?
But can you eat fried rice with corn and not poop a single whole kernel?
Do you like more sweet or salt popcorn?
- Por que no los dos
little bag of popcorn
One of those microwavable dillyos?
\ Any superpowers from the PFAS yet? 😏
- No snack bag already popped
Will you use these newly discovered powers for good, or evil..?
How you do feel in this moment? Coming down the stretch and seeing the finish line, what was in your head?
C/unhingedpost

63 comments