The sheer arrogance

It was bringing you your food and sharing it. Much more advanced than my cat which brings food neither one of us wants (giant spiders) and not eating it (it's still alive and under my bed) and then shouting about it (please send a team to help extricate the arachnid)

Maybe the giant spiders are meant to be a way for you to learn to hunt, before graduating to actual food?
They could be meowing at you like a drill sergeant.

My cat also prefers to eat when I'm nearby. I think it's a comfort thing.

Eating as a family is often better than eating alone. Especially when you're going to be sharing the food like cats do.
In the wild they are probably vulnerable when eating so maybe it's for protection. I'm no expert though.
- I recall reading that cats in the wild are considered semi-social, so while they usually don't hunt together, they do like to eat and hang out together with animals they like during down time. You're part of their in group.
The difference between a pet cat and a feral cat is that pet cats associate human interaction with being fed.
- My cat is free feeding and does not get fed by humans. But sometimes he yells at me to follow him to his bowl so he can eat with me.

I love my cat, and if he did this, I would be absolutely flattered that he felt safe to eat a meal on top of me. Plus it’d be so freaking hysterical to wake up to such an absurd scenario you’d never expect to happen! One of those things you wish you got on video

My cat will carry his toys to me and drop them at my feet when he wants to play, for context.

True story. I woke.up wirh my.cat touching my face, like intentionally trying to wake me up, when I opened my eyes she droped a LIVE cockroach In my face. I guess she was trying to warn me or give me.a gift but that was traumatic
- Bro that was traumatic to read. Please accept my condolences. I hope you will recover.
- Did you scream immediately? ...the cockroach didn't enter your mouth doesn't it?
- LOL. Our cats are just so thoughtful aren’t they?
Username checks out :P
My cat wakes me up every night somewhere between 4 and 5 and asks for belly rubs. She goes back to sleep after 5-10 minutes.
- My cat keeps waiting patiently till I open my eyes, and as soon as she notices Im awake she runs up to my head and starts rubbing her own head against my face. She gets so worked up she sometimes does little cartwheels.
- She’s trained you well! And how can one say no to rubbing cat belly?
Cat tax?

This is the cat's way of telling you, "I am looking forward to consuming your flesh when you die in the house."

Why was there pizza sitting out in the open unrefrigerated after they'd gone to bed? Seems gross.

Never ripped it so hard you stuff your face silly and pass out?
- I actually haven't, but I'm willing to stipulate that it happens
Someone skipped college years entirely it seems. Or just general adulthood in my case
Who said it wasn't in the fridge? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
- If it was, that cat deserves to eat it wherever the hell it wants.
I was floored when I learned that some people do this. It's disgusting and a good way to accidentally eat botulism
- Do you have a source on that? I'm pretty sure pizza does not go bad in 24h at room temp and normal humidity. While I agree that food safety is important not everything needs to be stored in fridge temperatures.
  Well it depends on what one considers normal temperature and humidity I guess, now that I wrote this.
- Er doesn't botulism specifically develop in oxygen-free alkaline environments? Seems like it's unlikely on a day old pizza left on the table...
  Besides, I always leave pizza out for days before consuming it all. To be fair, this is mostly in the winter when the house is cooler. And I don't eat meat.
- a good way to accidentally eat botulism
  Not particularly likely; Clostridium botulinum doesn't like oxygen. Still a good way to get food poisoning of some sort, just probably not that particular sort
- Bro thinks there's going to be leftovers the next day
- I hope you never meet my family. Literally everyone aside from me just leaves leftover food in the pan/oven instead of putting it in the fridge. Sometimes for more than 24 hours (time depends on when I find it and put it in the fridge, because lord knows they won't)
  Yes I've yelled at them a million times and told them they're ruining the food and risking health problems. No they don't care.

I always wanted to be one of those nude models that have sushi served on them. That would be rad.

Power move

Poor kitty wanted a warm pizza andthis was the only way it knew how. Get a cat-operated microwave now.

He wanted to ask permission 🥺

He wanted to share too lol

Maybe the cat was a Japanese businessman in a former life.

I Was A Businessman But I Was Reborn in Another World As A Pizza Stealing Cat?!?
- I think I saw that on Crunchyroll

At least it was pizza from their own kitchen and not something they found outside.

I have a hunch that this cat was roleplaying that he killed a big ape and was now eating it.

"You see this, human? Good. Now go clean my poop corral.

The cat is being merciful by only eating your pizza. Make sure it is always well fed.