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Funny @sh.itjust.works

2w ago

sure way to get a man

103 comments

Commas aren’t hard people
- Commas aren’t hard, people.
  
  Commas aren't, hard people.
  
  Nailed, it.
  
  Commas are more like limp people
- This meme needs a semicolon, though.
  
  Semicolons are hard people
- Commas aren't; hard people
- This is correct.

Go stand by an E-111. You don't want no fighter fanbois. You want a reliable and versatile ~~machine~~ partner who is non-violent, capable of accommodating the needs of two, and has full capsule ejection.
- lolll & with that edit and the strikethrough it seems like you really had to go back in and correct “machine” lol
  
  You may not form romantic bonds with aircraft, but I do. I'd fuck an airplane if given the chance.

Looks like the upcoming Cunk on Tinder

What's the male alternative? Trying on shirts in the wrong size?
- Go to the grocery store and keep staring at the scented soaps
  
  Ok, now what.
  
  Devilishly clever!
  
  Pro-Tip: Until they recently dropped the misleading product, "Unscented" Dove soap had perfume in it. Sensitive Skin Dove soap does not.
- There isn't one. When that stuff about "they chose the bear" happened, they meant it.
  You have to be vetted and have an in, give their dog bacon. Volunteer.
  
  There isn’t one. When that stuff about “they chose the bear” happened, they meant it.
  RIP women, but tbh what did they expect when they chose the bear
- I usually have a woman initiate conversation with me in line at the grocery store every 3-4 trips just by minding my own business. IDK if they mean anything by it or how to turn that into a date but it is something that happens.
  
  Must be hella cute IRL (✿◠‿◠)♡ ;))
- Just stare at tits until one of their owners falls in love with you

That might get you a grandpa, may I suggest a video game store?
- Depends on how much she likes a plus sized man with a fedora collection.
  
  To each their own

I have a picture of my wife posing in the children's cutout in the back, I jokingly asked if she wanted a picture with it and she got excited and ran over to pose.
I mean, we were dating at the time, but one of the first dates I took her on was the Wright pat airforce base museum.
This would absolutely have worked on me when I was younger. You know, if I had enough confidence to talk to women when I went to museums alone....

I had to read that multiple times, confused as to why their work was looking confused in a museum and how dating apps were conflicting with that.
- Dating apps aren't working time to make a meme with bad punctuation.
- That's because it was written very shittily.

Should try that one at your local Games Workshop. Maybe ask about that Heresy you have been hearing so much about...
- So I hear this guy Erebus a lot, he must be the main good guy, right?
  
  Erebus is a stand up guy, he won't stab you in the back.

I'd be careful, weirdos who wish the war went the other way feel emboldened lately
- The volunteers at my local air museum all were just excited about the planes and the little demos they had. They also had a huge Rosie the Riveter section because it was the bomber plant filled with ladies building planes to kill Nazis.

Some 78 year old docent will approach you.

It's a trap fellas. You don't approach women in public anymore especially at a museum. Next thing you know you are spending the rest of your life combatting the fall out of that time you went viral for being a "creep at the museum". Best to call the non-emergency number and wait for a professional.
- https://stopstreetharassment.org/resources/male-allies/how-to-talk-to-women/
  https://www.wikihow.com/Talk-to-Strangers
  
  I am just tempted to print out that wikihow thing onto 15 pages, approach someone, and start following it step by step, reading it from the paper.
  
  Got it, don't approach anyone ever.

She’d have an easier time cosplaying as Scully at an X-Files convention.
- Maybe, if she wants an older man that has RFID sheets.
  
  Who doesn't?

Has she considered infodumping? I hear that's a great hook. Might even be able to stay in the plane museum if that's her interest.
- I have a museum near me that has some old trains.... 🤔

I mean, yeah? I volunteer at a local old airport/museum, and that is pretty much my jam

It took an unreasonable amount of time for me to understand what the message was saying

I still wouldn't be able to talk to her so...

Might have even better luck in the Roman history section.

Might pick up a girl too...

As a man, i just wait in front of a mural with angel wings and wait around for the million of wonen who take their profile pictures there.

The Imperial Roman section also works.

I read this wrong and thought this was akin to "don't dip your pen in company ink"

got gay vibes... maybe i have a chance

I wonder if that’s Willow Run, I was just there. Totally would have lied about the planes to her. No on second thought this has hard barriers around the planes, WR there’s nothing.

Just go join a hobby club filled with guys, like electronics, radio, astronomy, FPV drones, RC cars, etc.. Or if you're more of a physical person: paintball, camping, fishing, shooting... Don't do audio though, a lot of audiophiles are fucking dumb.

Sure, if you want a pedantic patzy history buff. Lol.

103 comments