It's a sign of affection

We can watch them on your phone.

99% of marriage is sharing stuff you find and 1% asking if they heard you.

you clearly have not met my grandparents with hearing issues. it's like 50% "HUH?" and another 50% "how do you expect to hear me if you don't put your hearing aids in??"
- But when you take them out your ears are so COMFY and nobody YELLS at you and you can’t hear your husband’s STUPID looping tiktok videos playing from the next room.
  Source: hearing aid haver who sometimes takes them out at home or streams podcasts through them and just communicates through pantomime and lipreading despite my husband’s patient exasperation.
- I think if you marry young, it starts at 1% and grows from there. My wife and I are approaching middle age, and we're only unknowingly taking to ourselves about 20% of the time.
- Sounds wonderful. So far my experience is limited to 25 yrs of cute animal facts and the occasional "are you listening, dear?"
“Where is the …..?”

Yeah but now I know all about dehumidifiers, what are you bringing to the relationship, Blair?

Desicant dehumidier.
The way they react its almost like they don't care about the drop site massacre of Isstvan V!
fr, like ok your loss if you don't want to see this lip reading of a coach absolutely losing it on the game official and how it was pieced together from three different angles
maybe bad example, my ex loved that shit and still sends it to me

My wife interrupts me, then makes me wait for the video to loop around to the start so she can make me watch it on her phone. Often it doesn't start correctly, so she has to try again. Invariably, by the time it actually plays for me, it doesn't live up to the effort that went into showing it.

If I want to share a video with her, I just send her the link via text like a human being. She can watch it when she wants to, or just ignore it.

Tell her to swipe to the next video, then swipe back. That will cause it to restart. Learning this little trick saved my marriage, and my life, because if I had to listen to that stupid fucking music slathered all over every damn video even just 1 more time, I was going to either have a fatal stroke, or go on a murder spree.
Yeah, I have a friend that I share a bit of time with and she just sends me the links. I'll get around to them. I've never made her watch a YouTube video on my phone. Honestly, I'm not into YouTube videos as a general rule unless I'm looking at really specific product tests. So I'm definitely not forcing others to look at that.

It's okay, the trade deal is YouTube videos on his phone, tiktoks from hers.

I purposely never joined Instagram. No one warned me about the amount of Instagram I would be shown after marriage. Even worse: the amount of abrasive and caustic noise pollution I have to hear next to me in bed from 5 second snippets of people's concert/wedding video shorts on Instagram.
- My husband is constantly watching tiktok. The 5 second looping identical dumbshit music clips with screeching car noises on top will drive me to violence some day.
- I'm here for you, brother. We stand in solidarity.

Your information is out of date. It's actually so much worse now: we've got bros out here trying to get people to look at their slopgen videos. 😒

am i getting old
- Looks to be like you're barely a day old

Married 34 years. Can't say I've ever been forced to watch videos on my husband's phone. Although if he's splitting a gut, I usually ask if I can watch it. Married doesn't mean attached at the hip or phone.

What is “splitting a gut”?
- Committing sepuku. It's the wife's responsibility to stitch a man back up after doing this.
- Laughing so hard as to cause abdominal cramping
- Uncontrollable laughter

It's only 37 minutes of technical off-road driving get over it

but what if that video is about a master craftsman transforming an old book into a genuine masterpiece? it's only 2h 🥺

( link for those who would watch it with me on my phone )

I love Four Keys! So I'd be able to get out of watching it on your phone by saying I've seen the whole series! =D
- but have you watched nerdforge book making yet? (makes custom novels to present to the author in this video)
- that just sounds like a challenge to find something you haven't seen >:)

My wife actually agreed to watch the new Naked Gun movie with me and managed to restrain the urge roll her eyes through most of it. That's how I know I am loved. 🥰

I'm really looking forward to seeing that
- It was pretty good. Liam Neeson was a solid choice.

I don't get it.
She wants to get married, but apparently men constantly show videos on their phones, which she doesn't want.

Is that a thing? Maybe I don't know enough guys? The only person insisting on showing me videos on their phone is my wife so...

Or maybe she thinks it's an SO thing. I guess that would make more sense, now I think about it. For sure, my wife is the only person I tolerate this nonsense from.

It's an exaggeration. A joke. People often force their favorite videos on other people and it sucks.
- Two minutes in: Wait, wait! It's about to get good!
- Counterpoint: I don't think it sucks
It’s a thing, my buddies constantly want me to watch some YouTube dreck that I politely refuse
- I only just realised, but some of my younger colleagues really do love sharing videos, now that I think about it. Their ref game is strong and if you so much as hint that you might not get it, bam! it's video time for the whole office.
  I dunno, I'm old enough to have read the book about memes before it was even a word on the Net, so it might be a generation thing, but I don't care much for videos. Even gifs break my balls with the looping. I'd just have a nice pic if text isn't enough. But I'm the kind of person that will happily write pikachu_face.jpg and expect you to get and not force you to read the KnowYourMeme page on it, so I find the forced video watching a bit... like explaining the joke. It kinda kills the mood.
She doesn’t want to watch dude videos. Hating on that masc alg.

No I promise this one is really good!

Weird seeing a post from her, I was just watching an old Trevor Moore show with her on it.

Marry a woman?

I know it is unusual, but she might be straight
- Or American?!

On the opposite end it's dogs for some reason.

I want a relationship, but I don't ever want to live with a dog. Apparently that's literally impossible if women's profiles on dating sites can be extrapolated to the general population of women lol

I had an ex where I literally made a rule she could only show me five dog pictures per day.
my wife wanted a dog until we had a kid. I don't think she's willing to take on any additional responsibilities at this point.
So... Jeez... I guess my advice is "make a lot of rules and try knocking them up" ... But somehow that doesn't seem like good advice...
- My "problem" is that if I know they want/love dogs then I feel like it's wrong for me to pursue a relationship with them. I wouldn't want to make them give up something they really want/love just to be with me
  (I'm definitely not that special lol)
- I'm married, have two kids and they are driving the dog adoption. The wife is onboard and I can live with it although I do push back on the suggestion it will make my walks better 🐕‍🦺
Heh. I had some friends who got married because of their dogs. It's how they met, how they bonded, and the wedding was mildly structured around them. Some people really like dogs, and it shows.
I can take or leave them.
- The way I like to describe it is like the joke grandparents make about being a grandparent: "It's great, I can come over and love and spoil the kid then I get to leave."
  No dealing with all the extra bullshit that comes with dogs, barking, begging, chewing, walks, accidents, etc etc...

I must be a woman because I do not force people to watch YouTube videos 💖💖💖

As someone married to a woman I can tell you that I’ve got a strong data signal that it’s not necessarily your gender keeping you from forcing people to watch videos.

My wife only has to watch porno on my phone, this lady is getting ripped off.

If not satire that is definitely not a flex lad
- You have much to learn of the world, kid.
- bro, it's great. "Look at the size of that one!" "Damn, can you believe he would do that?!" "WOAH! Look at her do THAT!"
- If you have never watched some absurd hentai with your wife, you haven't lived.

God forbid a man initiate a Bid for Connection

I don't think the gender is the point. The person in the pic is just straight

Cast the screen to a TV?

That’s quickly turning into a privilege only a portion of the population will know about.
Can't cast to the TV when you use smarttube like any reasonable person would.
Edit: turns out you can actually!
- Righto. I haven't tried for a while. I was thinking of casting the screen as opposed to an app. I wouldn't be surprised if that feature was dead though.
- Sounds like a bug in the TV 💅

Marry a lady!

Also, pedantry: activate! It's not an either-or situation -- it's a both situation.

Resume: Either get married and be made to watch on a man's phone Either don't get married
The meaning of either or
used to refer to a situation in which there is a choice between two different plans of action, but both together are not possible
Thus, if you want to truly feel that pedanticness, getting married or not getting married is, by definition, an either-or situation, since you can't be married and not married at the same time.
Questionable though my reasoning my be taking the context into account, get outpedantic-ed!
- Does this mean any "both" situation is actually an either-or, because the choice is still between both or nothing? I don't like that

Wait so if I see a cheeseburger I can’t pull up the 3 second clip of Ecchan saying "Cheeseboige"? That’s cruel.

No, you'll have to perfectly recreate it yourself. If she loves you, she'll draw a woddermelan for you.
- Sad meskmelon noises

Meet halfway, tell them they have to screen cast to the closest TV or no watchie

(sigh) is this it for life? Just a never ending struggle between the biological urge to couple up and a desire to tell absolutely everyone to just fuck off so they're not disrupting your peace you're not disrupting their peace.

I'm done. Fuck it. I'm making an exit plan.

You've let other people influence you so much that you're upset by them. Life doesn't revolve around others; others just appear in it along the way as much as you want them to. Unless you enjoy being upset by people, there's nothing stopping you from ignoring them
Nooo Pyro it’s okay buddy