New life hack

Some things are just super easy to grow, others take so much effort its too much for the average person. But hell yeah, grow ur own food if u are lucky enough to own a garden.

Yeah. When I lived in NW Florida (ugh), jalapenos grew like weeds in a small pot. Always had way too many.
Also a fun fact: in early spring you can often see green grass-like shoots growing before the grass starts and are quite tall. Those are wild alliums, the same family as garlic, onions and scallions.
- We call it onion grass. I’m always yelling at my dog for eating them.
- I struggle so hard with peppers. Jalapeños growing like weeds sounds like a dream.
- Florida gardener too.
  Jalapenos do great, okra grows in the summer! The summer! Mustard greens will too, and the Stokes. Purple sweet potatoes. In the cooler seasons, collards, lettuces, fennel, I've had surprising success with broccoli and cauliflower. Tomatoes I can grow whenever but birds eat them. Radishes fail me every time. No carrots or radishes have worked, ever.. I just learned asparagus is perennial here, going to try that too.
- Isnt that just chives.
Is garlic easy? Uk climate
- Oh i have no idea, i have never grown garlic so far.
  Often you can get hardier breeds and i would expect it to be possible in the UK as longs as its not freezing.
  This looks like a decent guide. Basically lots of sun, not too much water, lil bit of fertilizer and you are sure to get something.
  https://getbusygardening.com/growing-garlic/
- Yeah pretty easy, have a go. Maybe a bit too mild to be ideal but if we're talking home production that doesn't matter much. There's a big farm on the Isle of Wight so we can't be too far off.
- It's relatively easy, because most pests won't eat it and they are pretty frost resistant. There are winter and summer varieties, so don't mix them up.
- Wild garlic might be a better option if you're able to forage for it.
- I live near a garlic town and it gets fuckin hot there
- Garlic is fine unless you're way up north, it's semi hardy so won't like a prolonged or hard frost but will survive outside just fine.
Lettuce and tomatoes are surprisingly good value. I'd put them top tier.
Not sure what else is really good. Beans are easy but you never get enough.

frantically types on keyboard with the cord stuffed into the dirt

Just got root access.

Nice one. Time to traverse the tree.
- Spanning Tree?
  I hear networking one of those is difficult.

Comes out of the fucking ground.

Sheep... They're woolly... It's wool!
- Fucking eggs come out of their arses!
  Fuckin' 'ell!

Nice 🥒

Infinite food glitch.

Their backyard soon:

Fantastic garden
- There are more. Just search "dacha garden" and you will find.

"It comes out of the fuckin' ground. I couldn't believe it!"

You cannot lose!
Upvoted and rewatched. Every time.
Mitchell and Webb have a relevant sketch for almost every situation.
You know what comes out of their bums?!

Pretty sure zoomers just troll boomers who genuinely think the new generation is stupid

As a millennial...zoomer humor is soooo much better than boomer humor.
- You don't like boomer humor knee slapper jokes like
  "My wife is a bitch, please take her"
  And
  "Oh look it's a homosexual"
  ?
- As another millennial... you're not wrong, but you basically put the bar on the floor there. The funniest thing about most boomer humor is that they actually think they're clever.
Also true

Babe, let's play Stardew Valley IRL like omg

Yeah, I hear the graphics are amazing!
- I keep having this glitch where I'm stuck in the opening scene with the jojo cubicle. I'm supposed to get a letter telling me I've inherited a farm but that hasn't happened yet, anyone else got this bug?

Neighbor tried to plant potatoes. She got about six pounds worth of top and no tuber.

We spent weeks debugging and still don't know what went wrong.

Potatoes you have to keep mounding up with dirt to force the plant to grow more roots (tubers) instead of the leafy tops.
- TIL. Thanks.
six pounds worth of top
Where is this neighbor located? Asking for a friend 👀
Top? No tuber?
- All stems and leaves and flowers and shit. But no potatoes growing in the roots of the plants.
- The leafy top is called a haulm and on commercial farms the harvester has a header that removes the haulm before the main part of the harvester scoops up the potatoes. Anyone who's played Farming Simulator is familiar with these machines, such as the Ropa Panther 2.

You can just take the bottom bulb from green onions, and just stick it into some dirt. Even when they're old and the green parts are slimy. I never bother watering, and they do just fine.

You can even stick them in a glass of water to get them to freshen up a little, but without dirt for nutrients, they will thin out and die eventually.

Stop playing God!
Tomatoes works too, paprika take the seeds out dry them a week plant them (inside first), etc.
Do this with a regular onion, especially if you've already got one in the pantry trying to sprout. As it grows you'll get onion greens that work just like scallions in any recipe. Let it go to seed, now you have infinite onions, but depending on your local climate and luck, leave your original onion bulb to winter, and shoot again, and it has probably split into new bulbs, so you'll probably get 2 new onions from the plant, plus onion greens, plus seeds. Eat one bulb, and leave the other bulb to grow more onion greens.
I've never bothered using the seeds, I just keep a bulb or two in the pot. Been 5 years. I still buy onions if I want something like onion jam or French onion soup, where I need like 1kg of onions. But Ive never had to buy scallions, and I've got onion flavour all year long through onion greens (you can dehydrate them, and freeze them really easily too, to store them when you have more than you can use)
I also highly recommend throwing peas into a large tray of soil. Litteraly just grab a bunch of aluminium foil disposable oven pans if you need to, stab some holes in them with a knife, an inch or two of soil, some dried whole peas or fresh garden peas, a sprinkle of more soil or just a wet sheet of kitchen roll/paper towel on top.
You probably won't get peas, but you'll have tons of pea tendrils for salads. On my balcony it's the only "salad green" I've had any luck growing. I have a pretty black thumb. I can't even manage to sprout chia seeds without them moulding, and I've never been able to grow mint despite broad casting mint seeds directly into my garden, urging the gardening gods to spite me with weedy mint but no dice.
When I buy peas, 4/5ths go in the fridge to eat, the other 5th gets planted, and I'll get ~10 dishes from the tendrils vs 1 dish from the peas. Nutritionally the peas have more protein, but lentils are cheap, salad is expensive, so this works for my budget.

The Bri'ish pay for wa'er! What's a fuckall?

The trick with garlic is to just bury it everywhere in your garden where there's space, no need for a vegetable garden. The leaves take minimal space and digging them back up only requires making a small hole, plus they apparently keep some pests away.

It's happy in a pot on the windowsill, doesn't much care about soil quality, can be harvested just for the greens.
I plant it everywhere though.

Tomatoes are easy to grow! They just take a fuck ton of water.

I hear they're much tastier than what you buy in the store.
- This is accurate; grocery store tomatoes are bred for durability rather than taste. The canned tomatoes down the soup aisle are honestly better than the fresh ones in the produce section. A large pot in a sunny corner of your back porch can do a lot better than your local supermarket.
- that applies to pretty much every vegetable out there.
- It depends on the cultivar, but usually yes!
Tomatoes and garlic, what else could you possibly need tbh
- Basil, onion.
- Eggs.
  Btw on average, how many eggs grow on an eggplant?
You can feed your dog tomatoes, and you don't even have to bother with seeding!
Or fertilizer!
- You don't need a dog for this, you can do it yourself.
Cries in having no sunlight in the apartment. Mine didn't survive the dark apartment life, so can't confirm.
- Same, friend. :(
  My aloe vera plant is doing ok tho

tiktok feed of threads user.

Picking up gardening at any age is a good thing not only as a way to stay active and keep your pantry better stocked but you also get a good sense of accomplishment

New life hack: this is what some of the very first human civilizations did to spend their time

Turn your life around with this ancient trick!
- You don't need the future, turn back time to the good ol' days.

Pretty sure it's this youtuber called Pro Home Cook. He and his brother used to do home recipes with limited pantry size and tools. But he got too big and started doing fermentation, sprouting, brewing and gardening.

I need to germinate the marijuana seeds that I have

Gardening is cool and absolutely can decrease your spending, but I want to take a moment to talk about how the efficiency of a home garden will never match industrial farming and that the cost effectiveness of fertilizers required to grow all of your own food would negate the savings unless you've got your own ammonia mine and recycle all of your poop.

So the last part I’m way ahead, it’s all stored in several tanks in my backyard.
- I love talking about this stuff so I was wondering if you plan to treat the urine with sodium to make urea as a nitrate fertilizers and if so what sodium source are you using?
Compost is a home project (and available in some cities as part of the waste management system) and nutritious for plants; but most of the things I grow as food I don't fertilize much or any. The fruit trees once a year or so, the garden soil sometimes in between planting or when growing watermelon or squash, bigger things do need some extra fertilizer (and tomatoes like some) but most seem to do fine with good soil and crop rotation/companion planting. Farmers have to use more because they've depleted the soil with monoculture. I still don't think it's cost effective when time is factored in, but it's better fresher food and not as fussy as farming.
- Genius, you just keep putting back less than you take and it lasts forever~! How come nobody thought of that? Snark put aside for a moment, I think composting on a large scale should be done, even in urban environments, but it won't impact the statement I made even a single bit.
Industrial farming, as commonly practiced, is unsustainable. We basically just turn fossil fuels into food, and degrade our environment (including our food production capacity) while doing it.
Vegetable gardening can definitely save you money, including negations. Most people, including myself, just do it as a hobby though.
I started vegetable gardening last year, and all my inputs, so far, have been free (with the exception of seeds, seed starting soil, and various inexpensive tools). I've used chicken manure from Craigslist (had to shovel it myself), home made compost (grass/weed clippings, arborist wood chips, kitchen scraps), and sometimes urine for extra nitrogen (lol). I've noticed that with adding compost on top of my soil, I don't really need much, if any, fertilizer (manure or urine).
Nitrogen-fixing plants can also be used to bring more nitrogen into your little garden ecosystem.
I haven't used any pesticides or herbicides. I just hand pull any weeds when I see them and mulch with either wood chips or paper with compost on top. I hand-pick caterpillars when I see them (or hunt for them when I see a lot of damage), and just throw them into my lawn (they don't seem to be able to make it back).
I'm still learning and experimenting, and have had certain species decimated by pests (brassicas), but I think I can experiment with timing, varieties, and hope natural predators will move in (I started planting plants in my perrenial beds that are supposed to attract beneficial insects, and put a birdhouse near my garden). If I find I can't grow certain crops or varieties well in my environment, I just won't. I save the seeds from my healthiest plants, so hopefully, this will eventually select for varieties that do well in my particular conditions.
- No matter how you slice it, surviving completely off of home gardening would not be any more sustainable than industrial agriculture. Just more costly.
Efficiency in produce per monetary cost. But for efficiency of human health per natural resources, I think gardening might be a winner.
- I think you're abstracting too much to try and make your point. What on earth does "efficiency of human health per natural resources" mean in comparison to "efficiency in produce per monetary cost". I think youre just lost in a little too much sauce when trying to justify your view.
- It was already well established that only the wealthy can afford a consistently healthy lifestyle, but thanks for chiming in.