Remember boys and girls, we born different, we build different. We have a lot in common, but than there are your relatives, friends, teachers, city where you were born etc. You can compare two things only if you have all other variables are equal, which is impossible. Doing your best is different everyday as well as every month and every year. Achievements of others shouldn't bother you, only your life goals should.
65I was gonna say something like this but you already said it, so imma add to yours
Everyone is talented in some way-- you might not be able to sing, or do acrobatics, or drive a racecar, but you can do other things. Everybody can do something, yes your somethings might be different but that's normal and perfectly fine. Things like talent and beauty are purely subjective, and even if you think you have neither of them that's just your opinion.
15I do agree with this as well, but wanted to add a little something that might give a different perspective. Let's say you are extremely gifted at being a computer engineer and you don't know it. Nowadays probably you start fiddling with computers and eventually find out. Let's say that you are gifted for this, but instead being born nowadays, you were born in the 1800. There is no way to know you were a gifted computer engineer back then because, well, computers didn't really exist. The inverse also applies as well. If you are extremely good at lightning up street lamps, nowadays that skill is not relevant, since no one needs to light up street lamps manually anymore.
I do think these skills have usually some sort of equivalent (even tangentially) and you find out what you can be good at. Is it your optimal skill? I do not think we can effectively know, since everything is not available from both present, past and future, all at once to be exposed to.
4Yeah, I can shitpost real good...
2
Don’t compare someone’s highlight reel to your behind the scenes.
I once convinced someone that they are actually doing a great job by sharing my struggles and showing that they are not an impostor. They now outshine me and will go to even greater heights.
And while that one episode of dealing with burnout and impostor syndrome is a drop in the ocean of their persistence, it’s a great illustration to how misleading comparison to others is.
PS: Also, if you have ADHD, you’re nearsighted in time. That doesn’t only mean “you can’t plan well”, it means “your life looks like a hazy blob, where others see a complex scenery”. And that can be devastating when doing a comparison. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others.
5As an enby, I'm going to choose petty spite and forget that we're born different
2It should also be mentioned that "talent" doesn't exist. Anyone that is good at something has put a ton of time and effort into practice. You're not born with skills, you refine them. Doesn't matter if you're an insanely skilled artist of some kind or if you're a darkness-dwelling, aurora-ignoring retro game speed runner, if you're good at something its because you earned that skill through countless hours of practice.
2Talent definitely exists.
4nuh-UH. Nope.
Talent ≠ practice ; talent + practice = greatness
Thankfully it's usually quite easy to dispel this myth by saying "then why are you bad at maths". We all had the same number of hours in maths class as kids, but some had to practice WAY MORE to achieve a passable grade.
Most people can't be Mozart. Some dedicate their lives to music, and do not get a fraction of the way there.
"Talent doesn't exist" is a lie we tell ourselves as a society because our individualist culture sells us a pipe dream of personal greatness that many/most people literally aren't equipped to achieve no matter how hard they try (and we should try regardless).
3yes thisss i wanted to say this. if theres something u really really wanna do but dont have a talent for it, learn it, practice, get better and u can do it. applies to virtually anything
2
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48At the age of 8 he enrolled at The University of South Alabama, where he received in 1994 a bachelor's degree in anthropology and is listed in the Guinness Book as the world's youngest university graduate at the age of ten. At the age of 14 he obtained a master's degree in chemistry at Middle Tennessee State University. At age 18 he obtained his master's degree in computer science at Vanderbilt University.
23I often use that as a source of encouragement rather than defeat. My two favorite sports are snowboarding and muay thai which are filled with people who've been practicing before they formed memories. If a child is better than me then I'm almost certainly capable of becoming that good with continued practice. Even if it takes years it's something to aspire to regardless of the relative age difference. I was one of those kids who was way better than a lot of people on a dirt bike. I was put on a dirt bike at the age of 4 and don't even remember learning, so it's not like it's a fair comparison. Just run your own race and aspire to be like those around you.
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Don't worry, someday you'll be like me; you'll be finding out someone taneted is much younger than you.
32The really fun part is that the first few times this happens to you, you're the same age and feel insecure that someone your age achieved more, but as you age in to your mediocrity you gradually get to see people who are younger and younger than you achieve more than you ever did, and now, likely ever will. But hey, there's always the memes to take your mind off it... oh wait.
27…as you age into your mediocrity…
I feel attacked.
2
This doesn't bother me. They're usually the type who put the work in to get where they are so they deserve it.
If it was a talentless incompetent hack who cheated their way through life and reaping the benefits they don't deserve, now that bothers me.
23That's my secret: I'm always depressed.
1920+ years and going strong over here. I wish my shrink would hurry up and get certified for ketamine assisted therapy.
6
Life is a marathon not a sprint. We don't all have the same problems and we don't all have the same tools at same time to deal with them and that's ok. The value of you is so much more than just the accolades you receive or the money you earn. The meaning to your life is whatever you decide that meaning is not whatever is forced upon you. Remember to be kind to yourself. All anyone can do is try and be a lil better than the day before.
16Then let the thought comfort you that talentless sacks of shit are running NPC streams on tiktok and making more money than you.
16Haha suckers doing more shit while i'm just chillin is this supposed to make me jealous lol ?
16I remember when Billie Eilish got big with her album at age 17 and I felt so crappy still making bat shit music at 18
15Our environment has a lot to do with it too, like what we're born into. Billie Eilish's parents were both actors with a very limited amount of success. She's not a nepo-baby by any definition of the word but she had parents who supported her passion and a have few connections. I don't know what your situation growing up was like but I can take a guess and say that your parents said to you what my parents said to me when I said I wanted to be a rockstar. "You can certainly try, but most people who do don't get very far." They were right of course. You can cut yourself a little slack, life is hard.
6Thanks for your kind words, but I have grown in the last few years ;) Today I would never ever want to get famous fast. I think it's very tough to find any meaning and contentment for people that got famous "over night"
2
It also hurts when they're younger, and have been doing it for less time than you. I'm a purple belt in BJJ, and have trained with people competing at a high-level that were basically small children when I started, and have done it for half the time I've been in the sport.
Pair that with working with several accomplished engineers at work that outlevel me, despite me graduating before they even went to university, and sometimes it's easy to feel a bit shit.
13Did you start bjj as an adult? Because if so, that's why kids are passing you.
4
I will never understand comparing one's self to others. You're like comparing Xbox to PlayStation. I remember my mother comparing my siblings and I to our cousins who were hustling at a young age (looking back now as an adult, it wasn't a good thing considering their circumstances at the time). I retorted by saying they're different people, why should I care? Then thankfully my dad backed me up from my mom's nonsense!
12Opposite for me. Parents always put me down and compared me to others. When I told my mum I wanted to be a plumber because they make a lot of money, she made me clean the toilets in the house for 2 years.
But that desire to gain your parents' approval is strong. I was a dumb kid with bad grades, and while I got into university, it wasn't a top tier one. Worked my butt off everyday, in part because I never got that praisal. Slow and steady, but I finally made it to a good job.
(Granted, plumbers still make a lot and my parents were kind of dicks for not realizing that, but my ambitions grew greater than that dream)
11
Try to find out where or what you really shine at, and keep going through that way!
11and meanwhile stop comparing yourself to others
11What do you do when you don't shine at anything?
5I'm guessing practice things until you do
1
To shine at something you have to put effort into it. Usually it's the lack of willpower that makes us average. Look at exceptional people, they succeed in very different areas.
3
Huh, you know what, I don't think I feel like this anymore. I used to, but now it doesn't bother me. Thank you for making me realize I have grown.
10Think of it like this way.
Whatever you think you are good at, some asian preteen is better at it.
So do stuff because you yourself want to do it, not to be better at it than other people.
9I felt like that when I realized most of the men in the avengers movies were my age. Like damn, they're all so good looking and accomplished and here's my fat ugly ass failing at everything.
8Genetics, steroids, makeup, lighting, and getting paid to work out. Don't beat yourself up, bro.
14
Hey, at least my feelings are accurate
7There's a time, when you will go to the hospital and the doctor will be younger than you. You will feel useless.
7First I just draw this head, then erase some of the details… there! A circle!
7That's one of the problems of a global communication network. There was a quote i read some years ago (which i wish i could find again) that more or less said that people with some talent who in the past would have been the pride of their village now compete with world class in that skill and now are seen as "average", yet in reality they're talented, is just that the bar has been unfairly raised to "Beat the best in the world".
6Let's make ya'll feel bad https://sam.zeloof.xyz/
Edit: His youtube channel since the web page doesn't work.
5the website doesn't work
4
Remember, Wilford Brimley (the "diabeetus guy" who was in those ads to lean on his fame as an actor) didn't start acting until he was in his 30s and didn't make it on screen until his 40s, and he wasn't a big actor until his 50s.
When I went back to college in 2020 about half of my graduating class was over the age of 30 and about a third was over the age of 50 (and honestly the older students landed by far the cushiest jobs by graduation, so they were able to skip about 10-15 years of career progression based on prior work experience in an entirely different industry/profession
5Comparison, the killer of all joy
5I remember I'd been playing guitar for about five years or something and thought I was getting pretty good when I met this kid who was 16 (the same age I started) who'd been playing for six months and was so much better at it than I was, it was scary. That was 23 years ago, and I might be as good as he was now. I'd like to say it never bothered me, but I still remember it.
5Same age? These days I get this with people that are younger than me....
5I had this when I discovered that my first friend who we bonded over computer achieved a better job at the same company. But I later landed a promotion that outdid him, so he can fuck right off. And now I’m in another highly desirable / competitive role. I’ve reached a point in my career where I’ve got nothing to prove to anyone but myself. It feels pretty great.
4yeah and at 27 they burn out get depressed and commit suicide. no thanks
3It's my whole life. Being compared to everyone and always being found unworthy.
2relatable af
2This day was going to be perfect,
The kind of day of which I dreamed since I was small
2Mine is JSchlatt ._.
1True. It takes talent to do what he did back in 'Nam. Those POWs had it coming.
1
talented at what exactly? Why would you care for what others do, admitting it is of any use to you -- and most of it isn't.
1Worst part is that they are from a third world country ;)
-3Lol, yea. I need to stop it but I often look people up on Wikipedia and compare myself. If their parents work in the same field or are like a politician or something I just mentally go "nepo baby" or "rich kid" to try to feel better about it. If they're younger, grew up in poverty and are still super talented... 😭
3
