Literally the Star Wars.
Including “…somehow Palpetine returned”
38I don't watch trailers to movies because I don't like movies I know I'll watch to get spoiled. I just groaned when I read that Palpatine had returned, and they put it in the opening scrawl!
6What, you mean you missed the canonical Fortnite event of Palpatine's voice ringing out across the galaxy? And then felt like you had somehow missed key plot events despite having watched all the movies because you didn't participate in some fad videogame marketed to tweens? So it showing up in the opening crawl felt forced, unimaginative, and honestly just stupid?
Yeah, that sounds like my experience too.
3
Stop giving away spoilers! That hasn't even happened yet!
3Are you kidding? It happened a long time ago! In a galaxy far away, no less.
14
I really ponder how anyone over age 21 can interpret it any other way. There are no supernatural books or stories. All kinds of people claim they hear the voice of god, it's the popularity of these specific stories that defines them as religions.
Science shows religion stories fit the pattern of schizophrenia: https://www.wnyc.org/story/dr-joseph-campbell-inward-journey-schizophrenia-and-mythology/
37Community. They do it for other reasons than the stories. They will defend the stories and say they aren't literal because you are on the outside. And once you are on the outside it's usually where you stay.
16I played in a church's band for a while. It was easy money. Then they wanted someone who'd do it for free, so, y'know. I was happy to make room and not have to play horrible music.
6
Mormonism is so totally Christianity fan fiction, it's had weird sex stuff added to it
27The Torah and the Bible already have weird sex stuff in it. There's relatively explicit stuff like the Song of Songs, but then again you also have weird nonsensical incest such as the daughters who get their father drunk to rape him for no reason whatsoever, which you cannot convince me wasn't written because some Israeli writer was horny. Just people writing about weird kinks like we've seen people do ever since the internet went live, except that the fellas making up the religion needed texts to add to the lore and said "Fuck it, let's get this one in too".
What I'm saying is that you just have to be born at the right historical time to get your kinks made part of religious canon.
8Loll it has Native American fanfiction AND sci-fi too. Apparently God lives close to a star called kolob, and
we'll allgood Mormons will be building planets someday.Also sex stuff. For good
MormonsMormon men7
Not just Mormonism, all Christian and Islamic branches are basically fan fictions based on the original books.
23The originals weren't even that original, they couldn't decide on which creation story to
stealinclude10Yeah cause the church mostly killed off the Christians with other books.
2
The trilogy isn't complete without a Jar-Jar Binks type character to play as the Antichrist who secretly rules the galaxy as a Master Sith Lord.
19That's scientology.
10Mee-sa RonRon Hubbard.
7
Isn’t Jesus the messiah in the Quran? Muhammad was just the messenger. In the Quran Jesus is literally called Al Masih, the messiah, and will ,according to the Quran, return to earth on the day of reckoning as the savior of Muslims.
11Well, the summary above is a little shaky there. The Quran just doesn't believe that the person that was written about is the actual Messiah but another prophet. The same I believe with the Jewish faith. They're both still awaiting the Messiah, whereas Christians are awaiting the second coming of the Messiah.
I haven't really looked into these religions in over a decade so my own memory could also be faulty, so take with a grain of salt.
13My understanding was that in Islam, they do believe Jesus was the messiah, and that he will come back in the end times, but not that he was God/the son of God. And that he wasn’t delivering Gods final message, which is where Muhammad comes in
But like you it’s been years since I put Islam under a microscope so I could be off too
8
Fun fact the second coming isn't explicitly mentioned in the Qur'an but the text can be interpreted to imply that he may comeback.
1
Book of mormon is the self insert fan ficttion thet got picked up by a publisher
10Mormonism is the fifty shades of gray to Christianity’s twilight
6
Quran vs new testament is more like Enders Game vs Enders Shadow. Enders Game is about Ender, and Enders shadow is about Bean, but Ender's significance is mentioned.
10They're all just the different movies of the Fast & Furious franchise. The plots don't generally matter or connect to each other in spite of their common elements, everybody's talking about family, people who haven't looked into it assume it must have some redeeming qualities, characters die and come back when needed for the plot, once in a while they inexplicably fly or end up in space and Vin Diesel never loses a fight.
8Don't forget the Bahái 4th movie what nobody remembers exists!
7Ok it isn't our fault that we don't remember it. The movie only had a limited theater run in one market. Also it was poorly marketed.
3
This is an interesting way of looking at these religions. From my limited knowledge it seems like a good high-level summary.
It could be interesting to expand this to include Buddhism (Hong Kong cinema?), Hinduism (Bollywood?), Baháʼí (?), cults, etc. Not sure if the metaphor will stretch so far...
5The Buddha is as badass as Chow Yun-Fat for sure.
2The Buddha would be like that time you found some kung-fu movie and checked Wikipedia to find out that you just watched the 32nd in the 43 movie long franchise. All with the same lead. Then remarked to yourself "how many times will it take before the criminal-ninjas-drug dealers learn to not randomly kill someone this guy likes?"
Really. He has a book about him that is slightly over twice the word count of the King James Bible.
2
Sounds like The Matrix to me
5Blessed are the RPG lesbians, for they shall inherit the earth.
2
careful if they see this they'll argue which of the movies came first
4No they won't...
1
God needs a good IP lawyer.
3The funniest part about it all, is that the Muslim says that anyone that doesn't believe is an infidel, yet the Jews think anyone that doesn't believer is a dirty Gentile, I guess that makes Christians double filth?
3exclusivity sure is a popular idea, they keep bringing it back.
3
This is golden. Bravo!
2Isn't the Quran more like a series reboot/re-imagining?
2Quran recognizes Torah, book of David and the gospels of Jesus as word of god. They just don't recognize Jesus as a divine beint, he's instead another prophet.
11So it is the Alan Moore contribution?
1
And of course there is a small Pali fandom that everyone thinks is strange
2And not forgetting of course, that a movie trilogy is a work of fiction.
1Mission Impossible 2: Jesus Rises
1
