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Have you ever been accused of something that wasn’t true, yet you had no way to prove your innocence?

I’ll start. Teenage me driving up the street to hang out with friends at the mall and passed my younger neighbor and his mom. When I got back a couple hours later, the neighbor’s mom was livid - confronting me for the slight. I seriously had no idea wtf she was talking about and I couldn’t convince her otherwise.

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  • Ahh, I have one story. It's also kind of my own personal tin-foil-hat conspiracy.

    I was living in a place where you could rent, but it was also a hotel. It had a Rent-a-Car inside, and I was working there. It was exceptional because I was 2 floors away from my job, so no need for commuting.

    Ultimately, and to make this long story short, I decided to leave the company (it was a small company, just my boss, his wife ane me), because one week I started to get paid less than what I was working, they probably thought I wouldn't notice.

    I immediately started looking for another job, and funnily enough, the hotel - where I lived - was hiring. They basically accepted me after the first interview, I told my boss' wife that I was leaving the company for the hotel so I gave my two weeks notice.

    Next day, I am driving through the highway with my boss to pick up a customer when he starts SCREAMING at me about going to work for the hotel instead of him. One thing stood out from what he screamed at me:

    "I will make sure that you don't get that job, or other jobs in the future, and you will never get this job back either, how are you going to live like that now? You just fucked up" - He said

    Now this is the conspiracy/accusation part:

    The hotel needed to do a drug test (they did that to everyone). The day of the drug test, I go to the place, do whatever I had to do, and they just told me to wait for an answer.

    2 weeks goe by - no response. I call and ask, they say they "lost" my tests. Strange, but ok. I went to do another one.

    2 days after the second one, they call me and tell me that the test was positive for weed. Now I'm not going to be a hypocrite and say I've never done weed. I have arthritis, so weed is something I sometimes need to handle tha pain and stress, but at that time I was clean for about 5-6 months.

    However, I told them that it's impossible, that I've never done weed, that I didn't even have money to buy weed. They straight up tell me they don't care and hang up.

    Exactly 20-30 minutes later, my former (rent a car company) boss -who I hadn't spoken to for more than a month- calls me, he doesn't even ask me how I am or anything, he just goes straight for "where you accepted for the job? How did the drug test go?"

    Now, call me crazy but...

    1. I didn't tell him I was doing a drug test, and if the hotel had told him, they still woul't have known when I did the drug test.
    2. How did he manage to call me exactly the day I got the results, almost at the same time?
    3. I called the hotel after that call and they told me that they hadn't even received a call from the drug test place to tell them that it has been positive. That basically I was the one notifying them. However, they said that since it was positive, I couldn't get the job regardless, no exception.

    At the end, I figured I was fighting a losing battle and searched for other jobs. 2 weeks later COVID-19 hit and the rent-a-car had to close, so that was good news for me.

  • Back in the day, I was stationed in South Korea when I was 18/19 years old. While it was legal for Koreans to drink by 18, US soldiers were expected to wait until they were 21. Soldiers 21 and over got ration cards in order to buy alcohol from the post's shoppettes. I was never 21 in Korea, so I never got one.

    One day the Criminal Investigation Division shows up and starts asking around about me. Sure I guess I was technically drinking underage on base, but I was legal once I left. And I hadn't done anything else shady or dodgy, so I was getting a little concerned.

    Turned out, I was being accused of buying liquor on base for cheap and then selling it to Koreans for profit because a bottle of real Jack Daniels was like $200 whereas I could have bought it for $20.

    I told them that I couldn't have bought it because I don't have a ration card for alcohol. They didn't believe me, but somehow it got cleared up down the road because I never heard another word about it. And I doubt it was mistaken identity because my height kinda precludes me from being misidentified, and the only other guy on the base that looked even remotely like me never got in trouble either and he was never questioned in the first place.

  • I'm 8 years old. For some reason I'm out the front of the house with a friend and his mum on my bike. Again, for some reason that makes sense to children, I insist on showing them how 'far' I can cycle, and go off around a corner a little way from our houses to find some kind of loop back. Not important.

    I find myself going down this fairly tight alleyway when a girl, maybe around 11/12, starts coming down the other way. There's just about enough space for us both to fit, but I'm not a very experienced cyclist and lose my balance, instinctively grabbing her handle bar to avoid falling into her bike. We're going slowly enough that we're both absolutely fine. I apologise profusely and remove my hand from her bike and back to mine, when she grabs my hand and forces it back into her handlebar. She loudly shouts 'DAD!!' and my heart absolutely sinks.

    This big guy comes round the corner. He was fairly tall and muscular, with short hair and a tank top. The main thing I remember is that he had terrible teeth, something I'm about to get a good look at. The girl informs him that I am 'bullying' her. He is immediately aggressive, detaining me in this narrow alley and interrogating me about what I'm doing. He shouted directly at my face, letting me feel his spittle and see his black teeth clearly. Her mum comes round to see what's going on. She asks how old I am, and I say that I'm 8 and just trying to ride my bike. She says "8's very young to be bullying" as if there's a more acceptable time. I insist I'm not trying to bully anyone but they have none of it. After 5 minutes or so the dad asks me where I live and as some sort of self-preservation I say through tears that i "don't know". They let me go and I cycle off wiping away my tears.

    I get back to my friend and essentially just say 'haha! I went a really long way', and that's the end of it. I never tell anyone for fear that they won't believe me, and I feel terrified that that girl or man will find me for the next year or two. Arseholes.

  • I don't even know where to start with this, it's happened so many times. Although I'm sure everyone has at some point in their lives. I mean the whole point of being framed is you can't prove your innocence. I will say though, it feels even worse when there actually has been proof of my innocence but the people who want to say I did something had such strong willpower that they were able to ignore the proof on a collective level and continue to accuse me of the thing I just proved my innocence about.

  • I get accused of not knowing about linguistics or history a lot.

    I am a degreed linguist, and the people who accuse me of it tend to be ethnic nationalists or right-wingers. You can’t reason with them. People don’t like being told that their language isn’t the end-all be-all or that minorities (gasp) have their own speech patterns.

    There was a notable incident on Reddit where someone complained that African-American Vernacular English wasn’t legitimate. I responded to the guy, who, in response, kept moving the goalposts. He asked if AAVE let Blacks “flourish”, I directly addressed it, then he took me to task because that was supposedly something he didn’t ask about. Then he spouted off about how Indigenous American languages were inferior because you couldn’t talk about quantum physics with them (which is false, but the hard Sapir-Whorf hypothesis is a tough bug to kill). The kicker is my interlocutor was from Texas. He shut up when I pointed out that “y’all” is, by his own metric, “incorrect English”.

    Watch their brains implode when they talk about how French is “legitimate”, and Latin is even more “legitimate”, and then you point out that French developed out of Latin via the same means and processes they demonize in minority speech.

    Or when people bitch that “I could care less” is incorrect English. It’s not; it’s an idiom. “Brazen” as a descriptor of methods or attitudes is descended from an idiom (nobody says “bold as brass” anymore though, so its origin is obscured).

    I even run into this on the fediverse (search my comment history).

    It gets worse when people write sources and facts off because it’s inconvenient. I was into it today with a Turkish nationalist who claimed that Turkish was the mother of all languages (it’s not even the mother of Turkic generally) and then went on to deny the Armenian genocide. I also ran into someone who tried to deny that Russian was a legitimate Slavic language because I cited George Shevelov’s work and obviously his last name was Russian, so he was a propagandist…when Shevelov is Ukrainian-American and spent a long time teaching at Columbia.

    Being a linguist on the Internet is an utterly Sisyphean task.

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