Be unstoppable.
Be unstoppable.
If marriage isn't annoying your spouse with your nonsense on a daily basis then I dont know what marriage is.
234ReplyMy wife is nearly annoy proof. If I texted that, she would get all warm and fuzzy.
84ReplySounds like your wife is keeping the Live, Laugh, Love pillow manufacturers in business.
75ReplyHave you tried removing the toilet seat 1 hour after your wife goes to bed, so that when she gets up to pee at 2am and doesn't turn on the light, she falls in?
Then you burst in, snap a pic, and upload it to your instagram with the caption "I keep the bitches pussy wet!"
Maybe THAT will annoy her?
33ReplyWell we cant have that, of course. You need to try some new tactics.
3Reply
Texting my spouse in another country with random nonsense, even though with our data plan, it's $0.10 a text.
16ReplyCan't you use something like Telegram/Signal/WhatsApp and avoid the charges?
10Reply
I literally promised an eye-roll per day in my vows. Can't stop, won't stop.
(Holiday inn)
16ReplyI should have married you instead of my wife. She’s just not that into it…
11Replyhey Donna...
3Reply
"Go with the flow."
Divorce noises.
158ReplyMenstruation jokes aren't funny. Period.
125ReplyImagine saying to your period:
"Be unstoppable!" 87ReplyI was thinking the same thing. “Unstoppable” is not a trait you’d want to impart to your period.
50Reply
For maximum effect, save "walk like a champion!" until she's rushing to the bathroom.
66ReplyIs "be unstoppable" really a quote you want on something that stops something?
61ReplySome periods ARE unstoppable. "Anemia" achievement unlocked!
33ReplyOmg the days I've had super plus tampons, PLUS pads, and they'd be soaked within hours 😭 thank god for birth control
11Reply
This is love.
57ReplyBaby please hurt me, please hurt me, some more
30Reply 24ReplyYou and me, baby, ain’t nothing but mammals
3Reply
This is a very brave person
42Reply 23ReplyWhat is love
21ReplyBaby don't hurt me
8ReplyDon't hurt me no more...
4Reply
Vladislav? Baby, don't hurt me...
6ReplyTrue love means never having to use your safe word.
2Reply
This is great. She’s got a keeper there.
16ReplyCan you imagine if a period never stopped. Poor girl would bleed out
12ReplyThat was my first thought. Stopping that flow is what your want the damn tampon for
2ReplyYou guys have no idea how a woman works. Stop embarrassing yourselves. Also there’s a kill switch just over the … argh you mother f… kill kill kill
2Reply
Do you just siphon through old , like decades old, posts from reddit or whatever? I mean I want to participate I just don’t know how far back into pre-history
8Reply 16ReplyNow you’re getting into old man shouts at clouds territory
6Reply
My litmus test is essentially whether I've seen it before or not, even if it looks like it could be old. If it made me laugh, I'll give it a shot and see if Lemmy enjoys it too.
6ReplyYeah and that's how it should be. Who cares if it's a century old if it's funny.
3Reply
his dick needs a tampon costume
8ReplyThank you kind stranger, now where the fuck can I buy one?
6Reply
I will be laughing at this one all day🤣
6Reply