Anon wants to be a vampire

People have more or less completely forgotten that vampires are meant to represent the monstrosity of an unchecked aristocracy/wealthy upper class. They sold their souls for power and now live exclusively by feeding off those beneath them. You don't just 'become' a vampire like you don't just 'become' rich. You can certainly become enthralled to a vampire though

141

I never actually realised this. Now I'm going to be thinking about every depiction of vampires I've been exposed to, for the rest of the day.

5
That was never the case. Traditional folk tales about vampires were a way to understand corpse decomposition. The narrative changed in 1819.

4
- "That was never the case." "That then became the case."
  
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- which anthropologist are you relying on for this analysis?
  
  3

Minus: can't eat garlic.

133

Well fuck

52
Man if I can't have Caesar salad you might as well just drive a stake into my heart now.

8
- Substitute with the much superior shalot. Reign supreme into eternity.
  
  5
I mean, you probably can, once.

5

Jokes on you Anon! If everyone is a vampire then who's blood do you suck?

48

You farm the remaining humans like livestock? We mastered factory farming 100 years ago, no reason things need to change just because the animals can talk back.

(banned from /c/veganism)

52
- Okay but among those people who choose to remain human, how many of us would be okay with donating blood every two weeks in exchange for food and rent?
  
  Think about it. If the vampires have all the power, why would they kill their food source when the longer they let their food source live the more food they get out of it?
  
  Let us tra-la-la and have happy-go-lucky existences, which will probably make our blood taste better to them, and they can spend their eternities competing for resources or whatever makes a vampire happy after the first 500 years.
  
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- Fun fact, human blood can be vegan, as long as the human is consenting
  
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- This was part of the plots in the movies Blade & Blade 2.
  
  The problem becomes apparent in this film: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0433362/
  
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- We mastered factory farming 100 years ago
  
  Speak for yourself! I haven't even begun practicing yet!
  
  4
- I'm still salty that PETA stole their web domain from People Eating Tasty Animals.
  
  3
He would quickly become pro-immigration

9
- Or a bunch of redneck vampires invade Mexico
  
  4

Anon has not considered the consequences of an entire nation of hungry vampires devoid of humans.

40

Well we have cows, might as well have human farms. Maybe genetically modified human with pockets of blood on their belly

13
- Delicious, juicy blood pockets.
  
  5
- what? so you have to bend over? naw. put that blood pocket on their neck like nature intended.
  
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- I too watched the blade movies
  
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Wasnt there a movie about this where almost everyone was basically a vampire, and started running out of humans and human blood to eat?

35

I think it was Daybreakers

29
- If I'm not mistaken, it's also the source of that meme of William Dafoe looking up
  
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- the most excellent-premise-crappy-execution movie i've ever seen
  
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I think Anon needs to retake middle school biology. You see there's this thing called the predator/prey relationship and if the predators outnumber the prey, things are gonna get real dire REAL fast. Like this:

https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0433362/

35

Yeah this is always the best thing when reading things like that; at the end of eternity we’ll be left with an immense amount of shrivelled, dusty and extremely hangry immortals.

11
- I was in a band called Extremely Hangry Immortals.
  
  We mostly played industrial horrorcore and metal covers of food commercial jingles.
  
  6
I wonder who sleep is better for

Prey or predator?

Party people, put your hands together for The Deadener.

1

Vampire here.

I don't drink blood (because that's disgusting, and also crual and unfair), I drink vaginal juices.

AMA

25

Hoe many liters do you need on an average day?

Do you avoid or embrace periods?

That's all

15
- I don't need much. Some abilities I can only use using blood (so called blood magic); Such as permanent changes to society; But for everyday life I can completely avoid using blood.
  
  As for the periods, I don't really care. I usually avoid them, but only because my girlfriend wants me to. I seek for social compatibility.
  
  3

OP really thinks vampires aren't gay?

21

OP really thinks The Gay isn't transmissible.

I've been to a few blood chasing parties, and let me tell you, I've seen straight men dying to suck other straight men after being bitten.

3

Congratulations, you're ageless, will never retire and you have to do a lot of manual labor, as it's cheaper than a machine, if you convert a country. If only a few are converted, others will want to hunt you down and put you on a shelve as trophy.

17

If i live forever infinite work can be contrasted against infinite leisure. If I'm being hunted that would give me the immediate motivation to live life harder than any mortal.

3

OP: Killing people isn't a con

16

Idk about this specific mask caused vampirism but depending on the type of vampirism you might not fully kill the person.

Just drain like a liter and move on. The person would feel no different than if they had blood drawn.

3

Anon might be Dio

14

Can vampires sustain themselves on alien blood? Just imagining a brood of vampires conquering Earth and then setting their eyes to the galaxy. Like they have vampire scientists who find ways to let them enter sunlight and enjoy Italian food once more.

12

probably depends on their chirality. (specifically, IIRC, sugars. sugars that twist the wrong way are useless)

3
- Then just twist them the right way... Duh
  
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Another con is that vampires are even more immortal than they appear. Even if the vampire's body is completely destroyed, their soul will wander through the universe, unable to affect anything, but still conscious. They can't even communicate with other vampires in that state. They'll get to see universe die starting 10 to the power of 16 years from now (end of star formation) until it's finally dead at 10 to the power of 10 to the power of 120, when universe reaches its final energy state. But at least a new universe will start at 10 to the power of 10 to the power of 10 to the power of 56. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timeline_of_the_far_future)

11

Where does that lore come from? I thought they literally gave up their soul to the devil, or whatever evil thing rules hell, to have physical immortality?

12
Expanding universe theory says it’s just guna expand infinitum and fade out to nothingness. forever

2
- Not a scientist, but that kinda relies on the big bang having infinite energy, which is probably impossible. Eventually gravity will pull everything back together.
  
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People suggesting you’d have to kill for blood haven’t seen true blood. IIRC the vampires in that book/show found a way to coexist with humans because human nations created artificial blood (that you could buy like soda at a convenience store etc)

Edit a whole bunch of other stuff happened, but that’s one aspect from that setting

7

Or bunnicula who drinks the juices of vegetables

Or Adventure Time where vampires can just eat red

3
In JoJo?

I don't remember this happening

1
- No, true blood, it was on HBO
  
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Before much longer, no one will be able to go out in daylight.

4

Can vampires sustain themselves on other vampires blood?

4

In Vampire: The Masquerade, it’s considered one of the most taboo act as you literally take in the life force and soul of that other vampire.

But it’s an alluring concept as it can make the aggressor more powerful (at the cost of some humanity… it’s cannibalism after all) AND the victim vampire is utterly destroyed (so one of the permanent ways to take out an adversary)

5
Some anime probably has that as a plot line, where super vampires only feed from regular vampires

2
- I went down a little rabbit hole a few weeks ago looking at different animes to potentially watch and came to the conclusion it's the closest thing to infinite monkeys on infinite typewriters. Anything you can imagine, there's an anime plot of it.
  
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For more about how an empire of vampires would turn out, read “Empire of the Vampire”

4

Devastating they didn't go with "Vampire Empire"

4
- I prefer it my way.
  
  2

Real quick question...Why are you thinking about biting black men right off the bat... You know porn stars, nurses, recruiters, etc all have blood as well?

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