Anon dates a 19 y/o

Generally it’s hard to connect with such an age gap but it does work sometimes. On those occasions, the natural genuine, and mutual draw transcends the age gap.

Rule #492 do not call women your own age a hag

Generally avoiding calling women hags is a good idea.

Exactly! Why the fuck would anyone want to date someone that much younger than them? I will never understand why so many men want to date girl so young.

younger partners are easier to control.
and less worldly experience means they won't notice their dull personality.
lack of maturity and life milestones to date similar age ranges.
over emphasis on bodily needs.
and i repeat, control.
A friend of friend I’ve met a couple times is into me. They’re 23 and I’m 30 and I still don’t have an interest. They’re perfectly nice, but…
I think after 28-30 it starts to really not matter that much but before that even smallish gaps can be pretty questionable. And any dude that would consider someone their age to be a “hag” probably largely dates younger because mature, experienced women can tell they’re really just garbage man-children.
- really just garbage man-children
  It's a green-text, we knew that from the get-go
- I agree with this. For me, so so much integral growth happens between ages 20 and 26-28 or so, and I don't really think people in general know who they are or what they want in life until then. Not true for everyone of course. All the people I know who married young are either divorced or super unhappy though so it may skew my perception a bit.
- Oh 100%. I knew a guy that was my age, that was always trying to date younger, because no women our age would deal with his bullshit. So... I guess I do understand, huh.
- For real. When I was 24, I dated a 19 year old for like two weeks. They were really nice and interesting, but ultimately the age gap proved to make a relationship unviable. I can't even imagine a nine year gap at that age. Gross.
People are feeling all kinds of pressure these days. If they want to have kids they need a lot of resources. But having a lot of resources is really difficult to do when you’re young. So that naturally suggests a compromise: one old with resources and one young with health.
- Wait, but I thought men hated "gold diggers"? And also, that's the result of our fucked up late stage capitalism economic system and not how things should work. A young couple should be able to afford to live comfortably and have children if they want.
- What I mean I've been alive a long time. I'm not sure how I was supposed to accrue resources through that though.
  Also who wants to date a 19 year old they'd be really annoying.
I mean, i'd like to date someone that much older than me.
- Why? (Genuine question if you feel like sharing) Like, I too prefer older partners, but not that much older.

Can't fathom calling a 28 year old a hag 💀

You haven't seen the 28 year olds Anon dates
- They're 48 in crackhead years.
Late-stage brainrot
My man just wants to fuck children.
It's a similar joke to calling 30-yos boomers

This is how I perceive the 28 year old to be.

His date:

Source: Brainrot Girlfriend

Bonus:

Love that we're making imaginary [gen-z/gen alpha/gen whatever the hell arbitrary title] the same way our parents and grandparents made imaginary millennials to get mad at.
The Silent Generation called their kids "Generation Me"
- The Silent Generation was correct.
- It was "The 'Me' Generation" not "Generation Me". Generation ____ starts with Copeland's Generation X book.
It feels wrong to read manga-style art left to right.
- The whole comic was brain rot talk that i didn't even notice it didn't narratively connect.
- Took me like 5 mins to figure out what was wrong...

Reading brainrot girlfriend has made me desire this.

What's brainrot girlfriend?

My partner's sister is 19, I'm in my early 30s now. But I met my partner when she was 19, I often ask myself did she come across as this annoying to people in their 30s back then?

Yes.

When did we as a society give up on the "½ X +7" minimum dating age formula?

When we decided to mind our own business and stop moralizing other people’s relationships based on our personal feelings.
- Exactly, this "rule" is really just equivalent to other forms of snake oil there is. It is baseless and completely made up.
- What's interesting is this rule apparently originated from the early 1900s.
  https://lemmy.zip/comment/21531881
Just FYI, this rule falls apart after a certain age (in the 60s or 70s).
- That's not the only thing that falls apart in your seventies, eyyyy
- I mean, once you're both above 30 who fucking cares
- After that age, the older party is essentially a lottery ticket
- Nah I think it holds up. Bill Belichick, 73, was in the news for dating a 24 year old and it's not only creepy and gross, but also like she's taking advantage of him by inserting herself into his interviews.
  If he were dating a 43 year old, I don't think anyone would be nearly as concerned.
- Duh. Who cares how much older one grampa is from another
Probably about the time that we decided that a certain age means you're an adult and can, in fact, make decisions for yourself
Wow that actually makes sense.
But then again, I’m born 1994, there’s not so many I can actually date. I have like 1990 - 1998 available, and they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together: those younger are TikTok addicted, those older are Facebook-relicts. I’m in limbo where I know all of that but don’t like anything.
Edit: to those who downvoted, why?
- Just for a little context, the minimum age being ((your age / 2)+7) is meant to be "this is the minimum age of someone you can date without it being creepy" (i believe it originated from the TV show how i met your mother)
  If you were born in 1994 you are either 30 or 31. Let's call it 30 for easy math.
  30/2 = 15 15+7=22
  So anyone who is 22 or older fits the minimum age concept, which is anyone born in approx 2002/2003 or earlier. If you decided to include that, the extra 4-5 years does increase the dating pool quite a bit.
  I'm not telling you who to date, just giving a little context to the math since that's what was brought up in the original comment.
  Edit: Lots of folks chiming in with some really good insight about the history of the math. Thank you all for that!
  Although the historical accounts seem to be math for the "ideal age" in a (probably female) partner and not "minimum age before it's creepy" as it was presented in HIMYM, it's really interesting to see how that equation has been used for over 100 years!
- to those who downvoted, why?
  Because of this part:
  they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together
- …those younger are TikTok addicted, those older are Facebook-relicts.
  You’re being very assuming with people and that’s why the downvotes.
  Not every person will be “TikTok addicted” or “Facebook-relicts”, you’re just assuming they are which is only affecting your own chances finding someone.
  Try just getting to know someone first before you start assuming about their interests or what they do.
  … and they must be an only child or have siblings within that age as well, otherwise the interests are not overlapping enough to spend time together…
  Who says you have to spend time with your SO’s siblings for any great length of time? Parties and holidays you can get through, but it’s not like you’re going to go live with the family.
  You and your SO should both have your own friends and hobbies (in addition to joint friends/hobbies). I’m not trying to crap on having a relationship with your SO’s family, just that it’s not mandatory.
  I feel like removing these two arbitrary requirements would vastly increase your dating pool. I get that people are looking for traits in a potential partner (doesn’t smoke / drinks / poly / not-poly / uses Arch) but the ones you’ve picked are just self limiting
- The clumsy portmanteau of facebook and derelicts if I had to guess. That one is just dreadful. Go with Facebougoise or something, The Faceborg maybe (I actually like that one), something like that.

And now you understand why older men dating young girls is creepy, even if legal.

They have nothing in common. There's no way. It's pure physical attraction above all else.

Edit: Seemingly a lot of older people down voting this are in denial about how much they have in common with some 18 year old girl/guy as a romantic partner. You understand you're not fooling anyone, right? Not even other people like you. Underneath, you all know what you're about.

Or both sides like to learn from each other and grow towards each other over time?
There are worse reasons why an extreme age gap is seen as creepy, "not knowing each others interests" is not one of them.
I'm 54 and most of the people I know are in their early 20s. We get along great and have plenty to talk about.
- Yeah, I’m in my mid 30’s and my best friend is nearing 50. His oldest child is the same age as my younger brother. Believe it or not, people can have common interests that aren’t entirely reliant on their age.
  Though I will say that age becomes less relevant as you get older… A 29 year old dating a 19 year old is pretty universally creepy, but few people would say the same about a 49 year old dating a 39 year old. Same age gap, but it’s assumed that the 39 year old has enough life experience to actually make their own decisions. Even in my mid-20’s, I was looking at 19 year olds as if they were literal children. There’s a lot of maturing that happens in the late teens and early 20’s.
- Sure, but there's a difference between hanging out with some 20 year olds, and being romantically involved with them.
  The latter requires a hell of a lot of maturity and being in a similar place in life to deal with things life throws at you. The former just requires laughing at some meme together you both find funny.
- You don't date though. A lot of people I know are young. Who else tf you going to meet nowadays.
  Though I'd date 25+, screw 22+, not younger.
- Acquaintances/Friends and "dating" are not the same.
A lot of people are downvoting this because a 19 year old is an adult who can make their own choices and you are insinuating that there's something so objectively wrong with dating an older person that it should be illegal.
- I am not in any way suggesting it should be illegal. I don't think I mentioned that once.
  What I am insinuating that if you're that young dating someone much older, there is almost always a massive power imbalance between the two in the relationship, romantically, and so it's a very difficult thing to overcome.
  If you're a 30/40/50+ year old person dating a 19 year old, there is usually something wrong with one party, the other, or both in that scenario. A 19 year old, romantically, is not mature enough or at the same place in their life as a 50 year old person. This will, at best, strain the relationship significantly as each partner will want something different out of life as the relationship progresses.
  If they don't, then one of them is likely a deeply broken individual. And that's usually going to be the much older person that's got some issues happening.
  The 19 year old truly doesn't know any better, or thinks they do, or is getting something in trade like security from the much older person and they're willing to give up other aspects of their life in trade for this.

I dated a 19 year old at 22 and even in that relatively minor gap there was palpable divide in mindset and priorities. I was looking to start a career and get my life established. She graduated high school a few month prior to turning 19 and just wanted to get high and watch musicals.

That's the mindset of plenty of people at 25 or 30 even. I think personal development/priorities are to blame more so than the age gap
- I consider 25 to be scrapping the bottom of the barrel for dating. I'm 29
- Ngl I'm 29 and definitely prefer getting high and watching stuff than actually doing real things.
I was barely 23 and am currently dating the same girl I met who was 19. (Its about to be 2 years woo!)
I had just gotten out of military so most girls in my classes were 3-4 years younger and I wasn't interested in dating (I like women a bit older than me) but she wreckingballed into my life because she saw something she wanted and actively attempted to get it.
This is the best relationship I've ever had but I won't deny that sometimes the response I get to something serious and wanting to plan ahead is met by my partner suggesting I move into the city (alone) to be closer just so she knows what it's like to have a boyfriend in the city.
Her focuses right now are being young and getting her excitement now before she has to square away. She used to think everyone has a stoner era and that was just what people did, so she was surprised how anti-drug/vice I was. The mental divide is definitely something I would warn people about when dating with age differences.
I dont understand the guys that date fresh 18 year olds in their near 30's, I know its legal but I genuinely dont understand what a 30 year old would find so interesting about an 18 year old other than just trying to bang/control them.
- I'm 41. The idea of dating anyone below 30 is a no-go let alone an 18 year old. I agree that anyone above 30 going for fresh high school grads is strictly in it for the unequal power dynamics and questionable sexual proclivities.
- In our modern world, i often forget that some guys like to date older too. I have a crush on a guy a couple years younger than me and have just kind of not done anything because we are coworkers and I fear he'll reject me for who i am, but thanks for the reminder
Maybe she was rich and could stay high and watch musicals for the rest of her life. What a lucky girl she was.
- Not in the slightest. She was already 12k in credit card debt when I met her.

people both younger and older than me talk like this and I just want to go anywhere else every time I hear it

No cap
- ong
- fr fr

md

    
> be me 34
> decide to look for a hag around my age
> most of them have at least one kid, usually the annoying kind, and only see you as a babysitter
> same ones are also super focused on their kids, no hobbies, no interests, no life
> most of them seem to be super conservative
> some of them are so bigoted they can only talk about "those people"
> finally found someone who's bearable for more than 20 minutes
> never mind, she's alcoholic
> finally found someone not alcoholic and is bearable for even more time
> never mind, she's both 300+km away and also married
How do I find hot singles on the fediverse? I'm not reinstalling Tinder!

I tried that with Reddit. Parents cockblocked me. Had nothing but my missed life to think about in the meantime, so my mental health slips, and I ask who besides Serial killers and rapists deserves to die (looking for a description of myself in the answers).
Implying someone's life is worth more than others is a big no no on Reddit.
Get permabanned for inciting violence.
- Nothing but your missed life? You can live a lot of life without a romantic partner, as much I very much understand it can still feel lonely at times.

I'm 34 dating a 25 year old myself. Which I checked, it passes the "Half your age plus 7" test

(34 / 2 = 17 + 7 = 24) Sometimes I still feel weird about it though

@ 30 22 feels waaay too damn young. tf am I even gonna talk to this person about? I'm a decade in to a high stress high reliability industry. I'm starting to get ~~Greg~~ grey hairs! I make jokes about all the child rapists I met while working for the state! Too much happened in that 8 years between us. Too damn much.
- God damn it Greg!
- Yeah, at 27, 22 was already like too young for me. Let alone 20.
- I have a 30-22 relationship rn (I'm 22) and we have like everything in common. Maybe it helps that we're also both nerdy autistic asexual trans girls with an obsession for solo videogames
I'm just a bit older, but been there.
I could never get past it though. I have a daughter too, and it really just takes one experience where they really remind you of your kid and... yeah, I don't think I can do this y'all.
Half plus seven is just a rough rule of thumb, that tries to capture some different concepts at play.
Personally, I never liked dating across major life milestone ages like 22, college graduation. The mid 20's are just an important phase in developing one's personality and sense of self, and being outside of the school environment is an important transition to learn. So when I was 30 I had a hard cutoff at 25, as I didn't want to be with anyone who still identified with being a recent college student.
I felt like a very different person as between 18 and 22, and between 22 and 26. But 26 wasn't that different from 30, and 30 to 35 only saw some slight changes. It'd be hypothetical because I was already in a committed relationship after 32 or so, but when I was 35 my cutoff probably would've been late 20's, and when I was 40 my cutoff would've probably been around 30.
"My girlfriend did this test and I think its broken? Her minimum age is higher than her starting age"

The brainrot is real, even with "old hags". My ex was 3 years younger than me, but she was an avid tiktok scroller. I was often being shown and taught about new "memes" that everyone promptly forgot about by the next week.

OP doesn't understand what cultural progression is. Of course different people gonna do stuff differently as time progresses, the class she was when you where in high school is just irrelevant.

This is the case where op just has skill issue, and is stuck in the past like a boomer he is.

When you call someone born in the late 1990s a boomer though. It might be "hip" or "trendy" to do. But Boomers were born in the 50s man. Young kids calling adults from different generations "Boomers" just makes you sound like you didn't pay attention in history class.
- Language transforms. Where before boomer would be a word for the generation born during the babyboom, nowadays it's used for old people who are unable to keep up with the times.
- Born in the 1900s? What'd you do before they invented fire? Ride dinos?
- Ironic...
Would you say that for someone underage? Age is age, gap is gap.

OP is still on 4chan. Lingo aside I'd say he's in his maturity range.

Also 19 and 28 are both still Gen Z.
- Is 30 the oldest genz or the youngest millennial?
4channers should probably just stay out of the dating pool entirely.

As an adult for most dating your peers is preferable to dating younger adults. I don't want to hear "So what was the gas crisis like?" on a date ever again (IDK what it was like I was 3).

I once made the mistake of dating someone 12 years younger than me (she was 25). Man, what a mistake, nevermind the cultural differences, her emotional maturity was....intolerable, and this from a person I'd considered a friend for a year already. It was the first and last time iv ever done that.

I date/have sex with who I'm physically attracted to. Otherwise I'm OK if we just stay (non-sexual) friends. Us having stuff in common doesn't make me horny for them or want to romance them.

If we have nothing in common because of an age gap, then the sexual relationship becomes a reason to learn about them. As long as we agree with each other on politics.

That said I have no expectations, admittedly atm all I've been getting is one night stands every once in a while and I'd like deeper relationships (I'm poly). But fuck maybe I just wont get one. shrugs I'll just keep trying until I get one.

I’ll just keep trying until I get one.
Literally all you can ever do.
That said, I never really got one-night stands as a thing. If I connected with someone enough for sex, I was typically getting along well enough for friendship.
Had three relationships that ran 2-5 years each before I got married, with a smattering of dating and perennial party girl friends in between.
But it's so weird to want to hook up, then never see that person again.
- That said, I never really got one-night stands as a thing. If I connected with someone enough for sex, I was typically getting along well enough for friendship.
  Admittedly, in my case I may be overstating the one night stand nature. I see see most of these women every once in a while out and about and they're still friendly. However I'd not describe us as friends but more like friendly acquaintances that once had sex who sparsely see each other out in the wild. I've not had the chance to get in another major conversation with them and walk to a place after (I don't live in town but I have an agreement with a friend), so maybe something more might come about but probably not. I think they knew that we did not have much in common and we were just bored and horny.
  I think once I move back into town in a month or two this might change. I'll end up seeing the same faces more often and maybe something can develop out of that more easily. Right now I commute to work, every blue moon hit a local place after work. There might not be enough frequency for solid friendship.
As long as we agree with each other on politics.
the new religion
- Yeah it kind of is. Thing is though its almost easy to avoid rightwingers for me, they don't seem to hit spots I frequent. Men or women.
  I can pretty easily look past it mostly if someone is religious (though I may engage in light ribbing because I'm an atheist).
  I did have one woman try and uh... "fix" me and my atheism at a bar. She was one of those neopagan "heretic" type crystal people. It was a strange experience trying to discern what the hell she was talking about. She seemed convinced that I understood her religious rhetoric but she was on some kind of advanced reading. She had me hold a crystal she kept in her bag. Admittedly we did not end up going to bed together... She was painfully hot and I was legitimately intimidated by how hot she was and how crazy she seemed.
  I kind of hope I see her again because at the very least it was kind of interesting talking to her. Then again IDK I'll probably continue to be intimidated and nothing romantic is likely to happen between us.
- I mean, maybe if you're a stupid person.

I actually vibe more with the generations after me than my own; but I would find it creepy myself to be with someone who isn't relatively close to my own age.

Anon isn't down skibidi style

Getting head while on the toilet?
- He doesn't know

I have not heard someone say "big mood" in years

Nothing ever changes.

Steely Dan - Hey Nineteen

What does that mean ? mid fr fr ? doesn't fr mean for real ?

Mid must mean "underwhelming"

And big mood ? that's very obscure

I think big mood is a relatable mindset
I think it means something like "this is 'mid' (i.e. uninteresting), I mean it". "fr" seems pretty similar to how a lot of people use honestly/"to be honest"/TBH, just kind of random words for emphasis.
- thanks that is starting to make sense

Hi! Sorry to inconvenience you, but I have just one question. The fuck did I just read?
- Either the most unwholesome Dom and sub description iv ever seen in my life or a rape fetish relationship?
  Either way as sonic would say. THATS NO GOOD
Police? This one right here!

Maybe OP could date a 9 year old on the side, to fill the age gap. Or is OP not rich enough to pull that of?

Mate, who hurt you?
I never considered that the ages stack
That will turn OP into OP (Peace be upon him)